Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem?
It is a well-established fact that a lot of animal
spieces
are nearly extinct and the rest of them Correct your spelling
species
is
approaching the same risk, too. The cause of Correct subject-verb agreement
are
this
is largely related to human activities and behaviour, and due to
this
reason
, the best solution for this
problem would be changing human habits. This
essay will look at the main reasons for the loss of wildlife and propose some possible ways of resolving them.
The chief reason
of
the problem is deforestation. The empirical evidence supporting Change preposition
for
this
position is overwhelming. As an example, according to
the articles published by environmentalists
a huge part of rainforests are now gone. The best solution for Add a comma
environmentalists,
this
would probably be prohibiting the companies to cut
down forests and Change preposition
from cutting
increase
the amount of tax that those companies pay, Wrong verb form
increasing
therefore
allow
animals to live in their natural habitat without any disruptions.
Another striking problem is global warming. The ice caps are melting and Wrong verb form
allowing
due to
this
reason
a lot of animals lose their home, therefore
, they go extinct or their number is decreasing day by day. In order to tackle this
issue people need to take care of the environment more, and especially do not use products that release to
much greenhouse gas emissions.
By Correct your spelling
too
the
way Correct article usage
apply
of
conclusion, taking into account all the above-mentioned reasons, I personally subscribe to the idea that Change preposition
in
people
activities Change noun form
people's
is
the main Change the verb form
are
reason
why animals are going extinct and lose their habitat, that's why, the best way to tackle these issues would be changing human behaviour and habits.Submitted by Ayan on
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task achievement
Focus on providing more specific examples and data to strengthen your argument. Referencing specific studies or statistics can lend more credence to your claims.
coherence cohesion
Consider diversifying sentence structures and transitional phrases to enhance the flow of your essay. This could make your arguments more dynamic and engaging.
task achievement
Ensure a closer connection between the reasons for extinction and the solutions provided. Demonstrating a clear link can make your argument more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Revise small grammatical errors and inconsistencies to improve clarity. Minor adjustments can significantly enhance the overall quality of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-structured and effectively frame the essay.
task achievement
You've clearly identified critical issues leading to animal extinction, such as deforestation and global warming, which responds well to the task requirements.
task achievement
Your suggestion to change human behavior and habits as a solution aligns well with the problem discussed, reflecting a good understanding of the issue.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?