Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?
The ongoing debate regarding the impact of violence in TV shows and video games on individuals has been debated for years.
While
some say the
exposure to Correct your spelling
that
such
content
encourages violent tendencies and contributes to aggressive behaviour in real life, others argue that it is a matter to
individual interpretation. I believe there are a few drawbacks which will be discussed in Change preposition
of
this
essay.
First of all, there is a confirmed correlation between exposure to brutality in TV and computer games, especially among young people
and children. The research suggests that sometimes such
content
blurs lines between fantasy and reality and as a result
, there are well-known cases of mass shootings in schools and public places done by people
with an
unstable mental health. Remove the article
apply
Therefore
, brutal content
is highly likely to impact empathy towards others in a negative way. Individuals might become less sensitive to the results of their own actions, which normalises violence.
Secondly
, aggressiveness online potentially increases such
emotions as fear and anxiety. For example
, people
become more stressed and the possibility of taking it out on others goes up. As a result
, this
prevents from
fostering a peaceful society and I believe Correct pronoun usage
us from
this
is a problem that needs to be addressed.
To conclude
even though there is an opinion that broadcasted aggressiveness might be a release for naturally violent individuals, I believe the drawbacks outweigh the benefits. Therefore
I support the idea of responsible consumption and limited hours when people
are exposed to such
content
. Additionally
, it is crucial to acknowledge the effects are complex and violence on TV is just one of many factors.Submitted by anapoliakovaa on
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task achievement
Aim to include more specific examples and data to support your arguments, as this can enhance the persuasive power of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Maintain your strong organizational structure, but consider varying your transitional phrases to enhance readability and flow.
coherence cohesion
You've effectively introduced and concluded your essay, providing a clear stance on the topic, which enhances the coherence of your writing.
task achievement
Your essay displays a comprehensive coverage of the topic, presenting a nuanced view that reflects good understanding.