IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Today more and more people want things instantly (e.g.: goods, services, news). Why is this? Is it positive or negative development?

#people #e #g #goods #services #news #development
In the present day, the number of individuals, who have the desire to obtain everything immediately, is rising. The possible reason behind
this
 tendency may be laziness, and it can have a positive impact on the relevant fields of research. It must be acknowledged that everyone is all lazy. People are only willing to do
things
 that provide benefits to them. Not at all, instant
things
also
 save one’s time and money, which can be spent on other useful
things
such
 as shopping and daily fees.
For instance
, citizens can read magazines and newspapers online websites where global information is posted to keep track of the news in lieu of buying those
things
. Another thing that must be considered is the benefits of contemporary objects.
According to
 human needs, technology is
also
 developed. If the world wants to have something that can bring back positive outcomes, there will be a large amount of scientists ready to invent it. The more people want an initiative, the more significant it is to the world’s development. The number of intelligent products will increase rapidly leading to numerous incredible ideas, or theories that can be applied in practice.
Consequently
, the human needs will be satisfied by scientific advances and the quality of human life will be developed. Taking all parts into consideration, the increasing size of the group of residents that need their necessities at an instant pace resulted from people’s laziness. Despite
this
, it benefits both the enhancement of artificial intelligence and civilization as a whole.

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Content Development
Consider expanding your discussion by including more diversified viewpoints and elaborating on the negative aspects of the trend towards instant gratification, as the question suggests evaluating both positive and negative development.
Vocabulary
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely and vividly. This adds depth to your argument and makes your essay more engaging.
Supporting Details
Try to incorporate specific examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your essay by providing concrete evidence for your points.
Paragraph Development
Work on the development of paragraphs. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea, supported by detailed examples and explanations.
Accuracy of Information
Avoid overgeneralizations, such as "everyone is all lazy." Not only does this lack nuance, but it also might not accurately represent the complexity of human behavior and motivations.
Organization
You introduced and concluded your essay, which helps frame your discussion.
Idea Development
You made an effort to link technological development with human needs, which is a thoughtful point.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Instant gratification
  • Technological advancements
  • Consumer expectations
  • Same-day delivery
  • Streaming platforms
  • Information overload
  • Decision fatigue
  • Environmental implications
  • Societal implications
  • Resource depletion
  • Marketing strategies
  • Consumer satisfaction
  • Quality of life
What to do next:
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