Some people think that watching sports in one's free time is just waste of time. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #sports #time #waste

this

busy life, most people need some interest for spending

time

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and experiencing a new pursuit.

However

, some argue that watching

football

on break is simply a waste of

time

. I absolutely disagree with

this

statement, there is nothing wrong with it.

In contrast

, it could be used to improve our business skills.

Firstly

, the context says that spending free

time

on the game is completely useless, can that be partially right? Of course not, it can be proved that computer games, which include sports games can improve your language skills and raise interest in sports.

For example

according to

the United States

football

team, most

football

players say they have gained interest from games.

In addition

, observing sports is not only a great source of entertainment but

also

can learn some new crucial knowledge about that game.

Thus

, contemplating a game during break hour is not a complete loss of that occasion.

Secondly

, it is

also

true that we can spend our break hours developing our business skills to become successful.

For instance

, I used my spare

time

at my school to read history books, which led to my history in a short

time

Moreover

, it

also

helps us to get more ideas related to our business, which could

resulted

Change the verb form

result

show examples

in a positive effect on our common life.

As a result

, I reiterate that spending a spare hour watching

football

is not a complete waste of

time

but

also

we could use

such

a session to accomplish given tasks.

However

, usage of our break

time

is fully dependent on our own interests.

Submitted by nejla.abdullayeva on Mon May 13 2024

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Expression & Grammar

Consider revising your essay for slight inaccuracies in expression and grammar to enhance clarity. Minor errors can distract from your overall message.

Supporting Examples

Ensure examples are directly linked to the argument you're making. This strengthens the impact of your evidence.

Transition Use

While your essay has a clear structure, aim to make transitions between paragraphs smoother. This will improve the flow of your argument.

Introduction & Conclusion

Your introduction and conclusion clearly define your standpoint, which is excellent for the reader's understanding.

Examples & Explanations

You provided a variety of examples and explanations to support your points, making your argument more convincing.

Logical Structure

The logical structure of your essay effectively guides the reader through your argument, demonstrating good coherence.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

264 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

communal unity
stress relief
economic impact
sedentary lifestyle
emotional investment
teamwork
discipline
healthier lifestyle
fantasy sports
interactive experience
leisure activities
personal development

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Some people think that watching sports in one's free time is just waste of time. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some experts believe that when a country is already rich, any additional increase in economic wealth does not make its citizens any more satisfied. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Television is dangerous because it destroys family life and any sense of community; instead of visiting people or talking with our family, we just watch television. To what extent fo you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In some countries, many people suffer from health problems due to eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. Do you agree or disagree?