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Band 6.5

Discuss the benefits of extra curricular activities to secondary school students. 400 WORDS

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Engaging in extracurricular
activities
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 offers numerous benefits to secondary school
students
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. These
activities
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, which take place outside of the regular academic curriculum, provide
students
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 with opportunities to explore their
interests
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, develop important
skills
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, and foster personal growth. Here are some of the key advantages of participating in extracurricular
activities
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. Extracurricular
activities
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 expose
students
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 to a wide range of
skills
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 beyond what is taught in the classroom. Whether it's joining a sports team, participating in a debate club, or learning a musical instrument,
students
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 can develop leadership, teamwork, time management, communication, and problem-solving
skills
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. These
skills
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 are invaluable and can contribute to their
overall
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 personal and professional development in the future.
For example
Linking Words
, debate class helps me become more confident in standing in front of many people and proudly speaking. Extracurricular
activities
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also
Linking Words
 allow
students
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 to explore their passions and
interests
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 in a practical and hands-on manner. By joining clubs or organizations related to their hobbies or future career aspirations,
students
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 can gain a deeper understanding of their
interests
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 and make informed decisions about their academic and professional paths.
This
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 exploration helps them develop a sense of identity and purpose. Participation in extracurricular
activities
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 can positively impact college admissions and future career prospects. College admissions officers often value well-rounded applicants who demonstrate a commitment to their
interests
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 and show evidence of personal growth and leadership
skills
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.
Furthermore
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, the
skills
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 and experiences gained through extracurricular
activities
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 can enhance
students
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' resumes and make them stand out in the competitive job market. In conclusion, extracurricular
activities
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 offer a wide array of benefits to secondary school
students
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. These
activities
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 promote skill development, self-exploration, improved academic performance, social and emotional growth, a well-rounded education, and increased college and career opportunities. Encouraging
students
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 to participate in extracurricular
activities
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 can contribute to their
overall
Linking Words
 personal and academic success.

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Examples & Evidence
Try to expand further on your examples by providing details or evidence. For instance, discussing specific outcomes of your debate experience or the ways in which these activities contributed to skill development could enrich your essay.
Sentence Variety
Work on varying your sentence structures for improved readability. Incorporating a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences can help make your writing more engaging.
Introduction & Conclusion
You've effectively introduced and concluded your essay, providing a clear overview and summary of your main points.
Logical Structure
Your essay is well-structured, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct advantage of extracurricular activities, which aids in the logical flow of information.
Task Response
You have clearly articulated the benefits of extracurricular activities with a focus on skill development, career prospects, and personal growth, demonstrating an understanding of the task.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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