The relatively recent development of games on phones, computers, and TV consoles is extremely popular with people all over the world. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such electronic games?

#development #games #phones #computers #tv #consoles #people #world

The modern enhancement of electronic gaming on smartphones, consoles, and personal computers is widely in demand

with

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citizens around the globe. The majority of individuals support

this

innovation because of its numerous benefits.

Nonetheless

, some people prioritize discussing its drawbacks

initially

. In the subsequent essay, both the advantages and disadvantages of the subject will be thoroughly examined. On one hand, the evolution of the gaming industry has merits for culture and society.

Firstly

, schools and universities adapt the plays into learning methods for their curricula;

moreover

, these practices have risen globally. As an illustration, teachers educate their pupils with mobile gaming applications to accelerate understanding knowledge and improve creativity.

Secondly

, e-sports increase the circular economy internationally.

For instance

, it attracts youths and adults to join the battle, whether for entertainment or professional competition.

On the other hand

, the development of the gaming sector

also

has some major demerits. Primarily,

the

Correct article usage

apply

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gaming addiction could have an impact on human health, especially vision abilities. Current studies indicate that the more eyes

exposed

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are exposed

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to screens, the more it harms the nervous system. Secondarily, the excessive use of online games on mobile devices could decrease productivity not only for workers but

also

for the general public.

For example

, when the employees are more focused on their phones for entertainment,

such

as playing Mobile Legend,

this

can distract the main job and lead to lower

performances

Fix the agreement mistake

performance

show examples

To conclude

although

modern gaming can have certain negative effects, like a destructive impact on the human brain and declining output ratios, it has a positive influence on boosting creativity and raising the growth of creative economics. I believe that the gains of the gaming industry outweigh its drawbacks.

Submitted by mayaanita.studi on Tue May 14 2024

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language

Try to enhance the vocabulary and use more sophisticated expressions to demonstrate a rich use of the English language.

content

While the essay is well structured, aim to develop your ideas more deeply. Providing more specific and detailed examples will strengthen your argument.

content

Ensure to maintain a balance between the discussion of advantages and disadvantages to present a well-rounded analysis.

structure

The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

content

Main points are supported with specific examples, making the arguments more convincing.

conclusion

The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and provides a clear opinion on the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

280 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cognitive functions
problem-solving skills
spatial awareness
multitasking
addiction
attention span
online multiplayer games
teamwork
communication skills
social isolation
economic impact
revenue
financial strain
stress relief
eye strain
poor posture
sedentary lifestyle

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The relatively recent development of games on phones, computers, and TV consoles is extremely popular with people all over the world. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such electronic games?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

many people feel violent media encourages real-life violence among young people. What do you think causes young people to behave violently?

Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.

In many countries, schools have started to include online learning as part of their curriculum. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?

Some say that people should continue to work in the same job for a lifetime, while others say they should change the job at least once in their career. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.