More and more people want to buy brands with cloths ,cars and other items.What are the reasons? Do you think it is a pisitive or negative development?

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Increasing
Add an article
An increasing
The increasing
show examples
number of individuals
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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the desire to purchase branded attires,vehicles and other
things
Use synonyms
.The most
promonent
Correct your spelling
prominent
factor behind
this
Linking Words
is to show their social status and riches.In my
perspective
Add a comma
perspective,
show examples
it is a negative progress because it is totally a
wastage
Replace the word
waste
show examples
of
money
Use synonyms
. To commence with,nowadays,everyone wants to maintain a standard of living which should
represents
Change the verb form
represent
show examples
their richness.To elaborate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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financially
well off
Add a hyphen
well-off
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persons always have an illusion in their minds that only the costly material
such
Linking Words
as expensive outfits,cars or watches etcetera are the symbols
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
show a high status in society ,so without owning
Linking Words
such
Correct your spelling
much
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stuff they could be thought
as
Change preposition
of as
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poors
Correct your spelling
poor
.
For example
Linking Words
, in the present society ,almost 80
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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of the population has the latest version of the
Iphone
Correct your spelling
iPhone
which is the most expensive brand of cellphones and shows that the owner of
this
Linking Words
virsion
Correct your spelling
version
vision
must have an
abundace
Correct your spelling
abundance
of
money
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, wearing or owning the branded material is the easiest way to boast of
people
Use synonyms
's
money
Use synonyms
. Probing ahead,the trend of buying the brands has a detrimental effect on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society because the
money
Use synonyms
wasted
for
Change preposition
on
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these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
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of
stuffs
Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
show examples
can be spent on other necessary
things
Use synonyms
.To explain it ,
people
Use synonyms
can donate the wealth spent on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
unnecessary and costly
things
Use synonyms
as there are
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
numerous
people
Use synonyms
in
this
Linking Words
world who do not have a shelter to live
or
Change preposition
in or
show examples
cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
to wear.
For instance
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
a survey done in India in 2019 ,the majority of
people
Use synonyms
spend
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
half of their
earning
Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
show examples
to buy
things
Use synonyms
which are not required but show their high
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
,
however
Linking Words
, it is not
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
right use of one's wealth. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
branded objects are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
symbols of
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good social status for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
,rather than wasting
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money
Use synonyms
on
such
Linking Words
things
Use synonyms
they should prefer to spend it for good a purpose.
Submitted by japjotsandhu8553 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on clarity and coherence by connecting ideas more fluidly and clearly throughout the essay. At times, the argument can seem a bit fragmented.
task achievement
Attempt to use more varied vocabulary and sentence structures to make the essay more engaging and sophisticated.
task achievement
Include more specific and relevant examples to support your points and provide greater depth to your argument.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively outline the main points of the argument.
supported main points
Main points are generally supported, demonstrating an understanding of the topic and critical thinking.
complete response
The essay addresses both parts of the question, providing reasons behind the trend and also discussing whether it is a positive or negative development.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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