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More and more people want to buy brands with cloths ,cars and other items.What are the reasons? Do you think it is a pisitive or negative development?

#people #brands #cloths #cars #items #pisitive #development
Increasing
Add an article
An increasing
The increasing
show examples
 number of individuals
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 the desire to purchase branded attires,vehicles and other
things
.The most
promonent
Correct your spelling
prominent
 factor behind
this
 is to show their social status and riches.In my
perspective
Add a comma
perspective,
show examples
 it is a negative progress because it is totally a
wastage
Replace the word
waste
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 of
money
. To commence with,nowadays,everyone wants to maintain a standard of living which should
represents
Change the verb form
represent
show examples
 their richness.To elaborate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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 financially
well off
Add a hyphen
well-off
show examples
 persons always have an illusion in their minds that only the costly material
such
 as expensive outfits,cars or watches etcetera are the symbols
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
show a high status in society ,so without owning
such
Correct your spelling
much
show examples
 stuff they could be thought
as
Change preposition
of as
show examples
poors
Correct your spelling
poor
.
For example
, in the present society ,almost 80
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the population has the latest version of the
Iphone
Correct your spelling
iPhone
 which is the most expensive brand of cellphones and shows that the owner of
this
virsion
Correct your spelling
version
vision
 must have an
abundace
Correct your spelling
abundance
 of
money
.
Therefore
, wearing or owning the branded material is the easiest way to boast of
people
's
money
. Probing ahead,the trend of buying the brands has a detrimental effect on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society because the
money
 wasted
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
 of
stuffs
Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
show examples
 can be spent on other necessary
things
 .To explain it ,
people
 can donate the wealth spent on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
unnecessary and costly
things
 as there are
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
numerous
people
 in
this
 world who do not have a shelter to live
or
Change preposition
in or
show examples
cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
 to wear.
For instance
,
according to
 a survey done in India in 2019 ,the majority of
people
 spend
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
half of their
earning
Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
show examples
 to buy
things
 which are not required but show their high
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
,
however
, it is not
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 right use of one's wealth. In conclusion,
although
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
branded objects are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
symbols of
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good social status for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
 ,rather than wasting
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money
 on
such
things
 they should prefer to spend it for good a purpose.
Submitted by japjotsandhu8553 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on clarity and coherence by connecting ideas more fluidly and clearly throughout the essay. At times, the argument can seem a bit fragmented.
task achievement
Attempt to use more varied vocabulary and sentence structures to make the essay more engaging and sophisticated.
task achievement
Include more specific and relevant examples to support your points and provide greater depth to your argument.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively outline the main points of the argument.
supported main points
Main points are generally supported, demonstrating an understanding of the topic and critical thinking.
complete response
The essay addresses both parts of the question, providing reasons behind the trend and also discussing whether it is a positive or negative development.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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