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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008 The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008 The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008
#show #uk #graduate #students #work #college
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The
two
Use synonyms
 diagrams below depict information on the activities of UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not have a full-time job after graduating from college in 2008.
Overall
Linking Words
, most students of both
groups
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 have chosen
further
Linking Words
study
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 voluntary
work
Use synonyms
 and
unemployment
Use synonyms
 of
graduates
Use synonyms
 were approximately at the same level as
postgraduates
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.
However
Linking Words
, the number of
graduates
Use synonyms
 who had part-time
work
Use synonyms
 was significantly lower than that of the other group. A common trend amongst
two
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
 of students was their choice of
further
Linking Words
study
Use synonyms
, voluntary
work
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, and
unemployment
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. As with both
graduates
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 and
postgraduates
Use synonyms
, the majority chose to continue their education.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
unemployment
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 in both
groups
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 was equal to half the size of those who decided on
further
Linking Words
study
Use synonyms
. Voluntary
work
Use synonyms
 amongst
graduates
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 and
postgraduates
Use synonyms
 was incredibly low compared to other selectives.
However
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 the
two
Use synonyms
 charts, the section for part-time jobs is noticeably different between the
two
Use synonyms
groups
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.
Whereas
Linking Words
 the number of
graduates
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 with part-time jobs is nearly at the same level as
unemployment
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, the level of
postgraduates
Use synonyms
 who have made
this
Linking Words
 choice reaches roughly the rate of
further
Linking Words
study
Use synonyms
 selection.
Submitted by katenok200312 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further, however".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words two, groups, study, work, unemployment, graduates, postgraduates with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Graduate
  • Postgraduate
  • Full-time work
  • Further education
  • Part-time work
  • Unemployment
  • Volunteering
  • Traveling
  • Gap year
  • Career progression
  • Job market
  • Transition
  • Academic life
  • Professional sphere
  • Economic factors
  • Social factors
  • Financial crisis
  • Long-term impact
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