The relatively recent development of games on phones, computers, and TV consoles is extremely popular with people all over the world. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such electronic games?

#development #games #phones #computers #tv #consoles #people #world

Nowadays, various gaming platforms have been significantly developed.

According to

this

trend, spending time on electronic

games

become tremendously popular everywhere. In

this

essay, I will elaborate on the merits and drawbacks of

this

phenomenon. There are several advantages that are worth considering.

To begin

with,

people

can release the stresses that are derived from their daily routines including working, studying and attending classes by playing

games

Hence

, they can feel more energetic and even feel achievement when they accomplish some tasks in the game.

In addition

this

, as playing

games

is popular all over the world,

people

can enjoy

games

with a myriad of

people

who are from other countries.

Thus

, it helps them to make friends and to gain social

skills

. On top of that, to have a conversation with foreign friends,

people

will consider learning a second language, which affects them in a positive way. In spite of the merits described above,

however

, it can lead to adverse detrimental consequences. First of all,

people

can waste too much time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

playing

games

as they can carry their gaming tools everywhere.

This

can induce them to get addicted to playing

games

Thus

this

issue

make

Verb problem

has

show examples

negative impacts on their daily lives

as well as

work and school lives, preventing

people

from being productive.

Secondly

, it can be harmful, especially for children. They should go through several crucial activities with their friends or parents to grow cognitive development and foam the creating

skills

However

, spending most of

time

Correct pronoun usage

their time

show examples

games

can make them miss the period and opportunities for it.

Furthermore

this

will influence

Change preposition

apply

show examples

children's lives regarding communication and social

skills

in the long run. In conclusion,

whereas

this

trend could make

people

to be lively and develop communication

skills

, it can hinder

people

from being productive and getting the younger generation developed.

Submitted by mirea0124 on Tue May 14 2024

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task achievement

To improve your Task Response, include more specific examples to support your points. Providing well-rounded arguments with concrete examples will strengthen your essay.

coherence cohesion

Consider refining your logical structure to further enhance the flow and clarity of your essay. Ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly will give your writing more coherence and a smoother narrative.

task achievement

You have correctly identified and addressed both the advantages and disadvantages of electronic games, which shows a comprehensive understanding of the prompt.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which contributes to a well-organized structure.

coherence cohesion

The use of transitional phrases helps in maintaining a good flow between the points discussed in your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

306 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cognitive functions
problem-solving skills
spatial awareness
multitasking
addiction
attention span
online multiplayer games
teamwork
communication skills
social isolation
economic impact
revenue
financial strain
stress relief
eye strain
poor posture
sedentary lifestyle

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The relatively recent development of games on phones, computers, and TV consoles is extremely popular with people all over the world. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such electronic games?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Aircraft have been increasingly used for transport fruit and vegetable to some country where such plants hardly grow or are out of season. Some people consider it a good idea, but some people

Some people believe government should spend money on building train and subway lines to reduce traffic congestion. Others think that building more and wider roads is the better way to reduce traffic congestion. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays many people travel to foreign countries for pleasure. Some believe this travel has a negative impact on the countries travelled to. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

With the increased global demand in oil amd gas, undiscovered areas of world should be opened up to access more resources.

Fewer and fewer people walk on a daily basis. What are the reasons and how to encourage them to spend their time walking?