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Writing Samples
Band 4

the diagram below shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station.

the diagram below shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station.
#electricity #power #station
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The given picture illustrates how electricity is generated from the river in the hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 station.
Overall
Linking Words
, the process
has
Verb problem
is
show examples
 done
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
day
Use synonyms
 and night. The
water
Use synonyms
 flows to the
power
Use synonyms
 station to generate
power
Use synonyms
 in
Use synonyms
day time
Correct your spelling
the daytime
show examples
 and from a low-level
reservoir
Use synonyms
 pump the
water
Use synonyms
 backs to a high-level
reservoir
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 night. The dam opens in the
day
Use synonyms
, there is an intake area which opens in
Use synonyms
day time
Correct your spelling
the daytime
show examples
. Through
intake
Correct article usage
the intake
show examples
 region,
water
Use synonyms
 flows from a high-level
reservoir
Use synonyms
 to reversible turbines. In
Use synonyms
day
Add an article
the day
a day
show examples
, the reversible turbines are used to operate a
generator
Use synonyms
. Using
Use synonyms
generator
Correct article usage
a generator
show examples
, the
power
Use synonyms
is take
Change the verb form
is taken
show examples
 from the
water
Use synonyms
 and
send
Wrong verb form
sent
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
through the
power
Use synonyms
 lines to national grids. The balance
Use synonyms
water
Change preposition
of water
show examples
 is
send
Wrong verb form
sent
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
to the low-level
reservoir
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
during
show examples
Use synonyms
day
Add an article
the day
a day
show examples
. During night time, the
water
Use synonyms
 which is stored in the low-level
reservoir
Use synonyms
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
sending
Wrong verb form
sent
show examples
 back to the
generator
Use synonyms
. The turbines to the
generator
Use synonyms
 pump back the
water
Use synonyms
 to a high-level
reservoir
Use synonyms
 and
then
Linking Words
 intake is closed. The
water
Use synonyms
 flows to the upper level for reuse and the process will repeat.
Submitted by insighttribez on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words power, day, water, reservoir, generator with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Reservoir
  • Penstock
  • Turbine
  • Generator
  • Transformer
  • High voltage
  • Renewable energy
  • Kinetic energy
  • Potential energy
  • Power grid
  • Sustainable
  • Flow rate
  • Energy conversion
  • Hydraulic pressure
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