In many countries, men and women are working full-time. It is therefore logical for women and men to share household tasks. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

In the contemporary world, in order to live comfortably
both
males and females are obliged to take full
work
shifts. Bearing in mind the equitable distribution of
work
, regardless of
gender
,
home
tasks
should
also
be equally shared between
women
and
men
. It is my contention that there should not be an impediment that prevents people from equitably allocating chores among themselves at
home
to promote
gender
equality
and ensure respect and dignity between the members of opposite sexes. First and foremost, the current dynamics of
work
life have compelled
men
and
women
to commit a full-shift
work
. Now that
women
and
men
are committed to a working lifestyle,
household
tasks
should
also
be fairly distributed. To cite an example, previously females used to do almost all the
household
tasks
,
whereas
, males were moneymakers for the families. As opposed to that these responsibilities are now being blended
due to
the female integration into the
work
-life. When
both
partners contribute equally to
home
management, it prevents resentment and conflict that can arise from the unequal distribution of labour at
home
.
Moreover
, ensuring long-awaiting
gender
equality
is one of the utmost priorities of every country and organization,
thus
, sharing housework with partners is essential for promoting
gender
equality
both
within the
household
and in society at large. Sharing
household
duties supports the well-being and career advancement of
both
partners. When one person is burdened with a
home
load, it is getting increasingly challenging for one partner to catch up with others, eventually leading to their underdevelopment in comparison with their peers.
For example
, by dividing these
tasks
,
both
individuals can better manage their time and energy, leading to professional outcomes. In conclusion, the equitable distribution of house
tasks
between
men
and
women
who
both
work
full-time jobs simultaneously is not limited to logic
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but is important for fostering healthy relationships, promoting
gender
equality
, and supporting individual well-being.
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task achievement
Your essay effectively presents a clear and comprehensive response to the prompt; however, ensure that each paragraph maintains a singular focus and avoid deviating from the main point of the paragraph. This will improve readability and prevent confusion about the main arguments being made.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the ideas flow smoothly from one to the next. Although you have good logical progression, some transitions between ideas could be more fluid. Use more cohesive devices — like linking words and phrases — to clarify relationships between sentences and paragraphs.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction effectively sets the stage and presents a clear thesis statement that outlines your arguments.
logical structure
Each paragraph focuses on a particular aspect of the argument, which contributes to a well-organized essay.
supported main points
You provide relevant and specific examples to support your points, which strengthens your arguments.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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