In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Companies
nowadays have a tendency to focus on the innovativeness of their
products
in advertisements. Personally, I contend that pressure from the market is among the major drivers
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
trend. Despite being a shrewd marketing approach,it is not a particularly positive one from my perspective. There could be an exhaustive list of reasons why
companies
present their
products
as somewhat original, but fierce competition is among the key drivers. When production becomes much more efficient, the market in many industries, particularly in consumer goods, is saturated with a plethora of different
products
.
This
saturation implies that if manufacturers wish to stay afloat, it is their job to differentiate their
products
from their
competitors’
Correct your spelling
competitors
show examples
. As consumers often equate newness with being superior in quality, a focus on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
innovative features could prove a focal selling point that incentivizes increased consumer demand. As an example, the
mobile-tech
Correct your spelling
mobile tech
show examples
giant Apple introduced a third camera for their latest
Iphone
Correct your spelling
iPhone
. Many argue that these features are little more than aesthetical novelty, yet they helped Apple attract new buyers and created an upsurge in demand for smartphones with high-quality cameras. Judging from a balanced standpoint, the aforementioned marketing methods arguably come with both benefits and drawbacks, depending on the position we assume. On the one hand, it helps consumers to be better aware of the point of difference in a product, thereby assisting them in selecting the product that best serves their needs.
On the other hand
, issues can arise when
companies
’ claims might create some false advertising. In order to attract customers, it is far from rare for
companies
to make
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
bold or exaggerated claims regarding their
products
, many of which are hard to substantiate. One example is in the cosmetic industry, where
products
are often marketed as carrying innovative
anti-aging
Change the spelling
anti-ageing
show examples
properties or revolutionary technologies, even when there is limited conclusive research.
As a result
, many consumers, gullible ones
in particular
, spend their hard-earned money on
products
only to end up being disappointed. If
this
malpractice were to become the norm, consumers’ trust in businesses and the messages they deliver would be corroded on the whole. In summary, many business entities are currently focusing on the original respect of their product as it provides a new experience to the customer to stand out from the competitors. The trend would be beneficial if
companies
can
Wrong verb form
could
show examples
make good on their claims, but
otherwise
Add a comma
otherwise,
show examples
it’d be little more than marketing gimmicks that |ultimately do irreparable damage to consumer trust.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
The essay adequately answers both parts of the question. However, some arguments could be more fully developed to demonstrate complete engagement with the task.
coherence cohesion
While the essay has a logical structure, some transitions between ideas could be smoother. This would help improve the overall flow of the essay.
task response
The essay presents relevant and specific examples that support the main arguments well, which is crucial for achieving a higher score.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay and provide a clear overview of the main points discussed.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
What to do next:
Look at other essays: