Write about the following topic. Some people argue that fashion items cost too much money. Others say that this is acceptable because fashion is an important part of life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowdays
Correct the word
Nowadays
show examples
,
fashion
and new trends can cost
wealthy
Replace the word
wealth
show examples
to the
humens
Correct your spelling
humans
. There
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
many citizens
look
Correct pronoun usage
who look
show examples
to the growth of the prices
like
Change preposition
as
show examples
some thing
Correct your spelling
something
show examples
normal. It is useful to be
awared
Correct your spelling
aware
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
fashion
and prices. In
these
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
essay, the two
viewpoint
Change to a plural noun
viewpoints
show examples
will be argued. On one hand,
fashion
can cost too much money for some individuals. Some of them
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
explain that they looking for
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
quality. In
addtion
Correct your spelling
addition
, they search for
shopping
Correct article usage
a shopping
show examples
mood
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
can
be provide
Change the verb form
be provided
show examples
by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
luxury
prand
Correct your spelling
brand
brands
such
as Carrtire,
lwee
Correct your spelling
love
,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
etc. I like to purchase from these luxury brands at
end
Correct article usage
the end
show examples
of every year. Just one time per year is
enogh
Correct your spelling
enough
to buy
gift
Correct article usage
the gift
show examples
that
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
deserve. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
hand, many
people
think
these
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
rise
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
fashion
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
is fair.
Likewise
, some think
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fashion
is
impotant
Correct your spelling
important
in
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
lives. To be honest, some
fashion
is
big
Change preposition
in big
show examples
demand
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the economy in some countries.
Such
like
Change preposition
as
show examples
,
Frace
Correct your spelling
France
show examples
, Italy,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
etc.
More over
Correct your spelling
Moreover
show examples
,
people
love to buy
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
wealthy cost and that
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
show examples
people
how
wealty
Correct your spelling
wealthy
they are. In my opinion it is
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
choice where they can buy, yet there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
a lot option of shopping
point
Fix the agreement mistake
points
show examples
provide
Correct pronoun usage
that provide
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
product with more quality in a great range of
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
. In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
,
people
have many choices of buying there as
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
wealthy stores and good price stores. They are free to
chose
Change the verb
choose
show examples
. From my own point of
view
Add a comma
view,
show examples
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of
people
need more information about
fashion
. It is better to exchange the experience about it.
Submitted by hanadi.alajmi92 on

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grammar
Work on improving grammatical accuracy and reducing spelling mistakes to make your essay more polished and easier to read.
content
Develop your ideas further and provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
cohesion
Improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs to enhance overall coherence and cohesion.
structure
You have addressed both viewpoints on the topic, which is essential for a balanced discussion.
content
Including your own opinion and personal example adds a personal touch to your essay, making it more engaging.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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