Some people say that school education is not useful and the essence of study can be acquired at home. Do you agree? Why or why not? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

#people #school #education #essence #study #home

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

A controversial argument has arisen between two views, the first viewpoint claims that

schools

Use synonyms

are not important and pupils can learn at home,

while

Linking Words

the other one disagrees with that. In

this

Linking Words

report, I will go through both sides of

this

Linking Words

conflict, and explain why I completely agree with the statement mentioned above. On the one hand,

schools

Use synonyms

do not help to teach students scientific subjects only, but they, indeed, teach them a variety of skills. For

further

Linking Words

explanation,

schools

Use synonyms

are tiny communities that contain rules, a variety of spots, and various statuses;

hence

Linking Words

, it is an ideal

place

Fix the agreement mistake

places

show examples

to teach children suitable behaviours and how to deal with different people.

Additionally

Linking Words

, many parents admit that after attending

Use synonyms

schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

, their children built many relationships even though some of them have social anxiety, so it is a helpful place to connect with others.

Besides

Linking Words

that, many reports capture that students do not study at

homes

Fix the agreement mistake

home

show examples

because of having a lot of entertainers there

such

Linking Words

as TVs, mobile phones, and games, so it is useless to study at home.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, going to school is time-consuming and there are a lot of alternatives.

For example

Linking Words

, a lot of smart students acknowledge that they understand quickly

while

Linking Words

their peers need time in order to understand basic information;

as a result

Linking Words

, they prefer studying alone so that they can finish quickly.

In addition

Linking Words

, many learners share on social media that they do not understand their teachers' explanations, so when they go back

Change preposition

apply

show examples

home, they start studying the same lessons again which is boring and time-consuming. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

schools

Use synonyms

are beneficial, they, indeed, lead to many negative consequences, and

that is

Linking Words

why I completely agree with the statement mentioned above.

Submitted by haneenalnetaif on Thu May 16 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion

Working on enhancing the logical structure of your arguments can greatly improve the flow of your essay. While your main points are clear, they could be better organized to ensure each paragraph directly supports your thesis statement.

Task Achievement

Provide more concrete examples to support your points. While you have included some examples, such as references to social media and reports, elaborating on these with specific details will make your arguments more compelling.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are well-presented, clearly stating your position on the topic and summarizing your key points.

Task Achievement

You have demonstrated a good understanding of both sides of the argument, which adds depth to your essay and shows a comprehensive approach to the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

289 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
In many countries, truancy* is a worrying problem for both parents and educators. •What are the causes of truancy, and what may be the effects on the child and the wider community? •* truancy = the situation when a child pretends to go to school but in fact goes somewhere else, for example to play unsupervised. The verb is 'to play truant from school.'
Truancy is a significant concern for parents and tutors in several nations. The main problems this cause is harassment and finding the social stress from the classmates and the aftereffects would be bad behaviour of the child.
4.5
band
Mrs Barrett, an English-speaking woman who lives in your town, has advertised for someone to help her in her home for a few hours a day next summer. Write a letter to Mrs Barrett. In your letter: • suggest how you could help her in her home • say why you would like to do this work • explain when you will and will not be available Begin your letter as follows: Dear …………….,
I am writing this letter with regard that i will help you about you chore in your hose for a few house
5.5
band
The education of young people is the main priority in countries around the world. Some people believe that educating adults who cannot read or write is essential for the society and more funding should be made available for it. Do you agree or disagree?
Education plays a crucial role in countries worldwide, with a primary emphasis on the younger population. However, there is a compelling argument that addressing the educational needs of adults who lack basic literacy skills is equally vital for societal progress. In my view, allocating additional funds for adult education is essential as it fosters inclusivity, promotes economic growth, and addresses underlying societal challenges.
4.5
band
In recent years, there has been a significant increase in the number of oil drilling operations in remote locations around the world. this has brought economic benefits to some countries, though it has also raised concerns about the environmental impact of these operations. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answes and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experiences.
The oil mining company nowadays has a rapidly escalating number in remote areas in many countries. This has raised financial advantages around the world, thus it has consequently brought massive awareness about drilling effects to the surroundings.
5
band
In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public.Why is this happening?Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money.
In digital era,public is being invested by the government in technology,thus wanting to attract the invest from other countries.The author believe that is the positive phenomenon due to protect the information and contact with the customers easily.

Some people say that school education is not useful and the essence of study can be acquired at home. Do you agree? Why or why not? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

The education of young people is the main priority in countries around the world. Some people believe that educating adults who cannot read or write is essential for the society and more funding should be made available for it. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public.Why is this happening?Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money.