many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay fit. ohters think there are more effective methods. discuss both views and give your own opinion
Lot
of individuals think going to Change the article
A lot
gym
is the best way to keep themself fit. Add an article
the gym
However
, many have Correct article usage
the oppsite
oppsite
mindset. Correct your spelling
opposite
This
essay will discuss both former
and latter Correct article usage
the former
notion
Fix the agreement mistake
notions
along with
my opinion.
To commence with, many people prefer going to the gym
beause
of the facilities Correct your spelling
because
now a days
gyms are providing like proper Correct the word
nowadays
equipments
for each Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
body
workouts, Change noun form
body's
maintaine
diet plans and offer various other Correct your spelling
maintain
maintained
supplymentry
services. To Correct your spelling
supplementary
Explicate
, there is no restriction when it comes to weather you can go to Correct your spelling
explain
gym
in any season it does not matter Add an article
the gym
Correct word choice
if its
its
raining or hot season as Correct your spelling
it's
its
built in a building. Replace the word
it's
it is
Furthermore
, there are various machines are
available Unnecessary verb
apply
along with
gym
trainers are available until closing time.
To cite an example, according to
the latest survey released in
BBC (Bombay Book Circle) 7 out 10 Change preposition
by
peoples
would prefer going to Fix the agreement mistake
people
gym
reason behind Correct article usage
the gym
is
they think Correct pronoun usage
this is
Correct article usage
the gym
gym
have proper Fix the agreement mistake
gyms
euipments
and they do have certified professional trainers who can Correct your spelling
equipment
explete
their results.
Correct your spelling
explain
On the other hand
, many thinks
that apart from the Change the verb form
think
gym
there are lot
of other effective methods available to build or to stay fit via doing some physical Change the article
a lot
outdoo
activities via participating Correct your spelling
outdoor
on
outdoor games. To elaborate, Change preposition
in
by
Change preposition
apply
joing
outdoor sports like cricket , football, Correct your spelling
joining
doing
swimming
in your daily routine can keep Correct word choice
and swimming
body
fit Correct pronoun usage
your body
build
stamina Correct word choice
and build
more
faster than Change the word
apply
doing
Correct your spelling
going
gym
.
For instance
, recent
article Add an article
a recent
of
Change preposition
by
Ministry
of Correct article usage
the Ministry
health
they have found that people who mostly do physical workouts with no Capitalize word
Health
gym
are much more
fitter than those people who just Correct quantifier usage
apply
follow going
to Wrong verb form
go
gym
daily.
Add an article
the gym
To conclude
, although
physical workouts is
much more effective Change the verb form
are
but
for those only who have ample Remove the conjunction
apply
of
time yet, Change preposition
apply
i
believe if you get proper Change the capitalization
I
equipments
, training and Correct your spelling
equipment
nutrition
diet will lead to better development of your body Correct article usage
a nutrition
also
, helps you to stay fit for Correct word choice
and also
longer
time. Add an article
a longer
Moreover
, most of the gym
nowadays in Fix the agreement mistake
gyms
multi national
cities provide flexibilities to come anytime of day or Add a hyphen
multi-national
noight
as they started operating 24x7 Correct your spelling
night
that
means you can go anytime whether Correct pronoun usage
which
its
daytime or Correct your spelling
it's
nightime
.Correct your spelling
nighttime
Submitted by chhabra.shekhar on
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introduction
Your introduction covers both views effectively, which is great. However, it's important to keep the tone formal and free of minor errors. For instance, 'Lot of individuals' should be 'A lot of individuals' and 'themself' should be 'themselves.'
task achievement
Under Task Achievement, while the essay does cover both viewpoints and provides your own opinion, providing stronger and more diverse examples can make your argument more convincing. Keeping grammar in check will also improve readability.
coherence cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion, ensure that ideas flow smoothly by linking sentences and paragraphs more effectively. Words like 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' and 'to elaborate' are useful but avoid repetition and try to vary your transitions.
task achievement
The essay brings up valuable points regarding the flexibility and facilities available at gyms and contrasts this with outdoor activities effectively.
introduction conclusion
Both the introduction and conclusion are present and cover the necessary points, summarizing your viewpoint well.
coherence cohesion
The essay uses connecting words to link ideas, which adds readability and a sense of flow to the discussion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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