Teenagers face a lot of difficulties at home and at school. What are the causes for this? How can parents provide solutions?
In modern times, most
teenagers
encounter countless challenges at home and school. This
is a social problem which needs to be fixed, attentioning their lives. To suggest some solutions, adults
and parents
should pay attention to their children
.
In school, many teenagers
make friends
and experience a sense of community before they become adults
. During their student time, they have to be familiar with friends
, adjust
to the social setting. Correct word choice
and adjust
For example
, in a school, most teachers require their students to be getting
Wrong verb form
get
along with
their friends
, suggesting a project which is needed to be a team. According to
this
project, students can acquire a sense of community and discipline and, teachers can help them foster the environment. From this
experience, students can recognise responsibilities and solve this
problem.
Sometimes, teenagers
could struggle with their future
dream
and plans because people often say that their Fix the agreement mistake
dreams
children
have to get their future
dreams, plan the processes, and execute these processes. However
, their children
might be prepared and nervous. Therefore
, parents
should be patient and advise carefully to their children
. If their children
struggle with imagining their future
work, parents
can provide an experience to observe
various jobs by visiting job museums targeted at Change preposition
of observing
teenagers
.
In contemporary, it is clear that
many teenagers
have to face too many difficulties in their lives, searching for their future
dreams and plans as well as
getting along with
their friends
. However
, adults
such
as their parents
and teachers can play a critical role in the process in which their children
make good decisions and provide informative materials to them.In conclusion, I believe that this
issue could be solved by the adults
who are close to their children
with wise advice.Submitted by jsy4893 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both the causes of difficulties faced by teenagers and providing potential solutions offered by parents. However, the explanation of causes could be more detailed and varied, highlighting different aspects like peer pressure, academic pressure, family expectations, etc.
clear comprehensive ideas
The essay presents clear ideas but can benefit from adding more diverse examples and specific situations. For example, discussing different kinds of academic pressures or providing more detailed solutions parents could offer would strengthen the response.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure is coherent, but there are some sentences that could be more concise and better connected. Improving the flow between paragraphs and ensuring each paragraph focuses on a single idea would enhance readability.
supported main points
Ensure that each main point is well-supported with relevant examples. Current examples, such as teachers encouraging group projects, could be expanded with more specifics to better illustrate how these experiences help solve the issues.
introduction conclusion present
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the discussion well.
task achievement
The essay does a good job of linking the responsibility of both schools and parents in addressing the issues faced by teenagers.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.