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Band 6

Describe a person you love/like/admire You should say: What relation this person is to you? What are your first memories of this person? How often do you see this person? And explain why you really admire this person.

#person #love #relation #first #memories
I am the kind of
person
 who does not admire people a lot but yet, If I have to talk about one, Today I would like to speak about a
person
 whom I admire the most and he is my husband. His name is Jatinder Singh. He plays a great role in my
life
. He works as a Long-Haul truck driver in Canada. We met in the year 2020 and got married in the year 2023. I am lucky to have him as my husband because he is the one who guides me in each and every step of my
life
. I find myself in a very safe and secure position, from the day I met him. He is like a miracle that happened in my
life
. I admire him a lot. We do not have many memories together as we got to spend only 2 months together yet we created some. After our marriage, we went
for
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on
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 a vacation in Goa and it was really fun. I did not meet my husband in
personperson
Correct your spelling
person
 as I told you we got to spend only 2 months together, and after
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
 he moved to Canada for work. Every day we have conversations on phone calls and we do video calls for a couple of hours. I wish I could go there and meet him in
person
 but I think that would take some time as my visa is in process. I really want to spend my
life
 with him. I admire him because he is a responsible and hard-working man. He tackles every situation wisely. He plays a great role in our family. Whenever we have any kind of issue in our house, we always take his advice and he guides us in an excellent way. Upon that, he is multitasking
as well as
 a very kind-hearted
person
.
That is
 why, I admire him a lot.
Submitted by jatinderpanaich328 on

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task achievement
You have provided a clear and comprehensive response to the task, sharing several relevant details and memories about your husband. However, to improve, include more specific examples that illustrate his admirable qualities through more varied experiences.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with a good introduction and conclusion. However, adding a few more linking words and phrases could help improve the flow between your points even further.
language use
Avoid repetition and ensure you review for minor grammar inconsistencies. For instance, "I did not meet my husband in person…" might be better expressed as "I have not met my husband in person since he moved to Canada."
coherence cohesion
Your introduction is engaging and provides a clear idea of what the essay will discuss.
task achievement
You have provided detailed reasons for why you admire your husband, making your admiration understandable.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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