Several people assert that the main cause of crime is an economically disadvantaged background. However, others say that crime is caused by a person’s nature. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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There have been growing concerns about ever-increasing

crimes

Use synonyms

all over the world, the main reason is economically disadvantaged background. I understand

this

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viewpoint because it is hard to maintain a basic standard of living, thereby the financial problems.

However

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, at the same time, I believe

people

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might be able to commit

crimes

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because of their impulsive personalities.

Firstly

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, an economically undeveloped environment seems to affect

people

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's violent behaviours.

This

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is because citizens in poor countries cannot be provided basic facilities like

fresh water

Correct your spelling

freshwater

show examples

or appropriate clothes.

In addition

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, there are lack of schools or educational institutes so

people

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will live under low quality of life. As for the main cause of these unfavourable views, I believe

people

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seem more likely to commit

crimes

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For instance

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, without having

such

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facilities, individuals might be able to break the law for survival, robbing food or expensive things to maintain their lives.

Therefore

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, I believe that

people

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living in areas that have been struggling with financial problems are potentially exposed to committing serious

crimes

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However

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, some

people

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may have committed

crimes

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unconsciously. Just imagine that a person who often hurts others without any reason. We listen to the news with these kinds of

people

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in common these days, making

people

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feel scared, innocent citizens are attacked by criminals who have violent personalities. I think those who commit

crimes

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intentionally can negatively affect society's threatened environment. Another concern is that individuals sometimes commit

crimes

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to show their strength.

In other words

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, a person's nature that desires to be shown strongly contributes to committing

crimes

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Consequently

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, I believe that negative

people

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's nature can result in damaging ordinary

people

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and society.

To sum up

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, as compared above,

crimes

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may arise for several reasons.

However

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, as a person who puts more value on

people

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's situations, I believe more citizens may wrestle with

crimes

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by undeveloped finances. I think we should assist those countries by providing donations and investing money.

kchengiiFri May 17 2024

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task achievement

Your essay covers both viewpoints and presents your own opinion, which is great. However, to achieve a higher score, ensure each point is fully developed. Provide more specific examples and statistics to support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Work on improving the logical flow between your ideas. Use more transitional words and phrases to connect your points smoothly.

coherence cohesion

Although your introduction and conclusion are present, make sure your conclusion more clearly summarizes the main points discussed in the essay.

general

You have addressed the topic effectively, discussing both views and providing a personal opinion.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction sets up the essay well, and your conclusion attempts to summarize your thoughts.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

321 words

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Several people assert that the main cause of crime is an economically disadvantaged background. However, others say that crime is caused by a person’s nature. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries, young people are moving from rural areas to cities to work or study. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In recent times, many people are making the decision to live alone. What are the causes of this? Does it have positive or negative impacts?

You learned the news from your friend regarding a part-time job at a new international company near your house. Write a letter to the manager of the company. In your letter, you should: explain why you need that job give details of what you can do for the company suggest the time that you can work.

You have recently made a purchase from the local department store. However, when you arrived home, you found a fault awith it. Write a letter to the manager, say what product is, explain the problem and say what you’d like to be done about it.