IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

TASK 1 the process below shows how drinking water is made using solar power.

#process #water #power
The picture depicts the cycle of producing healthy drinking
water
 by using photovoltaic panels with optimized renewable energy.
Overall
, there are three steps involved, which include energy transformation,
water
process
, and generating proper
water
 to drink. The first
process
 of drinkable
water
 starts with solar panels receiving sun energy
then
 changes into electricity pump equipment,
subsequently
, the pump machine which has high-pressure turn on to flow the
water
 into the filter
process
. The next stage is the
water
process
. The groundwater rises to the
water
 filter machine which has different-sized screens to separate the
water
 from the unuseful things
such
 as soil contain s, dirt, germs, and bacteria. Afterwards, the clean
water
 is gathered in the huge tank which has an automatic valve to flow the drinkable
water
 into the moveable container.
This
 tank is located above the wooden platform near the
water
 sources. Ultimately, drinkable
water
 is already to serve everyone in the university.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Improve the clarity by avoiding fragmented sentences and ensuring smooth transitions between stages.
task achievement
Elaborate on each stage with more specific details to provide a more comprehensive understanding of the process.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear overall description of the process and breaks it down into distinct stages, making it easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
The logical sequence of steps from energy transformation to providing drinkable water is well-maintained, demonstrating good structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: