Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familiar with. Discuss both these attitude and give your own opinion

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Some
people
like to do the
things
they used to do. Others like to try new stuff. Today, I would like to discuss both merits and demerits and give my opinion on
this
topic in the following paragraphs. Doing new
things
makes us feel excited because we always have expectations of them and the first-time memories are usually good.
As a result
, in my view, the
people
who like to try
things
are the
people
who have a
colorful
Change the spelling
colourful
show examples
life.
On the other hand
, I believe those
people
cannot focus on one thing and persist on it for a long time, because they always want to do new
things
. The
people
who like to do the
things
they originally did well are the
people
that we think it is traditional and stubborn. Most of them can not accept new ideas.
Therefore
, is pretty bad for their lives. We need to learn new technologies, concepts, knowledge, and so on. Because those are really beneficial in our daily lives. Learning could be torture, but we have to do it.
However
, those
people
have good skills in some
things
, because they do those
things
again and again for a long time.
Finally
, they became masters. In a nutshell, trying new stuff can broaden your horizons, but in the world, there are too many
things
we can do, and we can not do all of them.
Thus
, we only can concentrate on a few of them. Practice makes perfect. Some
people
like to do the
things
they like to do in the past. After doing them millions of times, they became the experts.
On the contrary
, those
people
sometimes can not accept the new ways.
In
Change preposition
From
show examples
my perspective, I tend to support the argument that we should keep trying
things
.
Submitted by edward300225 on

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task achievement
Your essay needs more specific examples to support your points. For instance, including an anecdote or real-life example of someone who frequently tries new things or someone who sticks to familiar activities would help to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Some ideas need further elaboration. For instance, when you mention that people who like to try new things may find it difficult to focus on one thing, consider explaining why this is the case or providing a specific scenario to illustrate the point.
coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your points more clearly. The current structure is understandable, but can benefit from clearer topic sentences and transitions between paragraphs to improve flow.
coherence cohesion
Consider rephrasing sentences to avoid repetition and improve clarity. For instance, you often use the phrases "the people who" and "things"; varying your vocabulary could enhance readability and engagement.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly sets up the discussion for both perspectives, which is important in an argumentative essay.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and provides your opinion, which helps give your essay a strong ending.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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