online education has more advantages than tradional learning.
Some people prefer traditional learning because they don't believe
onlineChange preposition
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education, teacher and they don't know how to join in online courses in some not developed places.
iChange the capitalization
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think that If you
goCorrect your spelling
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learning you will make
impressionAdd an article
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withChange preposition
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your friends.
If I take
disadvantageCorrect article usage
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fromChange preposition
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learning: you don't go
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courseFix the agreement mistake
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when you want.
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Your essay would be more engaging and understandable if you began with a clear introduction that outlines the topic and your main points.
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main point followed by supporting sentences that elaborate on that point.
Conclude your essay with a summary of your key arguments to reaffirm your stance.
You have made an attempt to compare traditional and online education, which is a good approach for this topic.
You've identified some reasons why people might prefer traditional learning, and you've begun to explore disadvantages.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
- Summary
- Restatement of thesis
- Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
- In conclusion
- To conclude
- To summarize
- Finally
- In a nutshell
- In general