Some people think news has no connection to people’s lives. Therefore, it is a waste of time to read the newspaper and watch television news programs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some
people
assume that consuming information daily through newspapers and
news
channels serves them no purpose. I completely disagree with the aforementioned statement and will explain my reasonings in the following passage.
Firstly
, in order for us to survive in
this
world, we need to be aware of what is happening around us, so that we can make well-informed decisions for our problems.
Also
,
News
is the only way in which we can know what is happening in another part of the World.
This
way, we can lend our hands to the
people
who are in need of assistance.
For example
, recently, there was a war between Iran and Iraq, so many lost their lives and numerous
people
lost their loved ones.
In addition
,
people
ended up being in the streets of these countries. They were going through a rough time and did not have any resources within their homeland. It was through the
news
, that many
people
around the globe were able to supply food, clothes, medicine and other necessary items through NGOs.
Secondly
, information can be broadcast within in fraction of
minute
Correct article usage
a minute
show examples
with the help of technology these days. The
news
spreads faster than light and many mishaps can be prevented. To illustrate, during COVID-19
people
from the West telecasted
news
and advised every nation to travel as the disease was dangerously contagious.
This
helped many nations
such
as Australia, the Zealand, the South Korea to keep
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
COVID-19 cases bare minimum. Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
we come across exaggerated
news
, rumours and fake information now and
then
, I am of the opinion that, we can not omit consuming
news
completely as it keeps us informed.
Submitted by u.umayal92 on

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grammar
The essay would benefit from ensuring consistency in tense usage and avoiding minor grammar mistakes. For example, using the correct forms of verbs like 'telecasted' should be 'broadcasted'.
lexis
Try to avoid repetition, such as in the phrases 'news spreads faster than light'. Opt for varied vocabulary to keep the reader engaged.
relevance
Your main points are relevant and well-supported with specific examples, such as the Iran and Iraq war and the COVID-19 pandemic.
development
The essay shows a complete response to the prompt, addressing both the disagreement with the statement and providing logical reasoning.
organization
The structure of the essay is clear, with a distinct introduction and body paragraphs that logically support the main argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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