Some people opine that entertainment or leisure activities should be subsidized by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
The topic of whether the
government
should fund amusement Use synonyms
activities
across the countries has long been at the centre of discussion for many. It is my contention that Use synonyms
while
making entertainment Linking Words
activities
free can offer multitudinous benefits, exorbitant amounts of expenses can play a downward trend during the effectiveness evaluation of Use synonyms
this
initiative.
First and foremost, in the contemporary world, many cities are devoid of parks, circuses and museums for their residents to savour on their weekends. Linking Words
Therefore
, I think it is a pragmatic Linking Words
investment
for the Governments to invest in so as to enhance the living standards of locals and provide them with better entertainment infrastructure. To exemplify Use synonyms
this
statement, in Azerbaijan, the local executive power has established multiple parks and outdoor Linking Words
activities
for locals to enjoy, Use synonyms
thus
, sparking a positive trend of increased satisfaction level in the surveys conducted in public. Linking Words
Furthermore
, financing cultural and recreational Linking Words
activities
can augment the social fabric of communities. Events like music festivals, cultural holiday gatherings and art classes can foster social bonds and help cultivate a sense of community and inclusiveness among diverse groups. Use synonyms
For example
, every year an annual Pomegranate festival is held by locals in Azerbaijan which attracts thousands of visitors from across the world. Linking Words
Consequently
, with the help of Linking Words
government
support, cultural and ethnic norms are shared and transferred to other nations Use synonyms
whereas
local farmers sell their homemade products at Linking Words
this
gathering.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, some critics opine that Linking Words
government
funds could be better spent on essential services Use synonyms
such
as education and healthcare. Linking Words
While
these are undoubtedly critical Linking Words
investment
areas, neglecting the entrainment needs of the population can lead to a decline in Use synonyms
overall
Linking Words
society
well-being. Change noun form
society's
Moreover
, Linking Words
investment
in recreational Use synonyms
activities
can Use synonyms
also
bring in additional revenues by promoting and selling locally produced products.
In Conclusion, Linking Words
although
the advantages of Linking Words
government
-subsidized leisure Use synonyms
activities
are important and profound, depending on a country's economic condition, diverting Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
investment
towards more rudimentary needs like healthcare and education can bring about faster payback to the Use synonyms
government
.Use synonyms
Submitted by orkhanshamil on
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task achievement
While the essay provides a complete response to the prompt, certain parts could be made clearer. For instance, the balancing of essential services against leisure activities can be a little more explicitly discussed to provide a comprehensive perspective.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is generally strong, but transitions between arguments could be smoother to enhance the flow. Consider using more cohesive devices to seamlessly connect your ideas and paragraphs.
task achievement
The essay effectively presents relevant and specific examples to support its arguments, which adds weight and credibility to the discussion.
coherence cohesion
Both the introduction and conclusion are clear and concise, successfully framing the argument and summarizing the key points.