Some young people are leaving the country side to live in cities and towns leaving only young people in the countryside’s. What problems are caused by this issue ? what can be done to solve this situation

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To begin
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with, in
this
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day and age young adults are leaving the countryside to live in capital cities and towns because of many issues
such
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as facilities or quality of growth. The following essay takes a look at what problems are caused by
this
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issue in my opinion. To start with, it is worth considering why several young adults chose to leave their town for the place where they never lived before. As mentioned facilities and elements of the heart are the main major points.
Due to
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, facilities at countryside are not much to use ,
for example
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, entertaining or public transportations.
For instance
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, in Thailand, most of the population in the rural areas move to to capital port of any part of Thailand they need to change their lives and hope that they will have a quality of activity than before. For,
this
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reason countrymen in big places are than in the small centre. When it comes to a solution, have to understand the significant factors to improve it and need help from governments that have to listen to what the citizens want. The local population, including capitalists, must
also
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play a part in the development of every providence. So spreading prosperity to all fields is essential because it will reduce the population in large spaces.
To sum up
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, The factors that cause
this
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mostly come from the fact that prosperity does not spread to all ranges.
Therefore
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, if every area has the same quality, there may not be many people moving in to look for life opportunities.
Submitted by np.napatping on

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task response
Your essay addresses the prompt effectively and covers both the problems and solutions as required. However, some ideas lack depth and specificity, which could be improved by providing more detailed examples and clearer explanations.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are logically organized, and the essay is easy to follow. However, some sentences could be clearer, and the connection between paragraphs could be stronger. Using transition words and improving the logical flow between ideas would help.
coherence cohesion
Supporting points need to be more robust. Some points are touched upon but not fully explored. To improve, make sure to elaborate on each point you make, providing clear examples or further explanation where necessary.
task response
Work on sentence structure and vocabulary for clarity and sophistication. Some phrases and sentences are awkward or unclear, affecting the overall readability. Practice varying your sentence structures and using more precise language.
coherence cohesion
You provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument well.
task response
The essay covers the prompt requirements by addressing both the problems and solutions related to young people leaving the countryside for cities.
task response
You have made a good effort to include examples in your essay, which helps to illustrate your points.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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