Some people say that the governments should pay for health care and education but others think that this is not the govrnment's reseponsibility. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Things
that should be covered by
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
or
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
are discussed at the moment.
While
some individuals argue that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health
protection and
education
are not the
governments
Change to a genitive case
government's
governments'
show examples
responsibility, I side with those who believe that those
things
should be controlled by the
governments
Fix the agreement mistake
government
show examples
. On the one hand, it could be argued that medical
management
and
education
should covered by
people
themselves because it could pose one challenge. As we know
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
not all
people
are well
payed
Correct your spelling
paid
show examples
.
Consequently
, covering
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health
care and
education
will make their expenses
rising
Wrong verb form
rise
show examples
, and it would
made
Change the verb form
be made
make
show examples
their daily groceries hardly
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
fulfilled. To illustrate, when
family
Add an article
a family
show examples
member from
lower
Correct article usage
a lower
show examples
income
suddenly on
sickness
Replace the word
sick
show examples
at the end
of month, it can be a disaster for them as the money
acoount
Correct your spelling
account
is less than the invoice
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
healthy
Replace the word
health
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service since the family salary
already
Add a missing verb
is already
show examples
used for daily groceries
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the start or middle date of the month.
On the other hand
, I believe with those who think that wellness
program
Fix the agreement mistake
programs
show examples
and
education
should be managed by the governments for two main reasons.
Firstly
, those
things
understandable
Add a missing verb
are understandable
show examples
not to be charged to the
people
as
people
already pay for taxes. The authority of
government
Add an article
a government
show examples
should
managed
Change the verb form
manage
show examples
the
income
from
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
taxes to
covered
Wrong verb form
cover
show examples
health
care and
education
as
income
from their
people
could be best when it serve back to them.
Secondly
, if the medical
management
and
education
are well manage
Change the verb form
are well managed
show examples
by the authority, they can
planning
Change the verb form
plan
be planning
show examples
to enhance the quality of public
health
and
education
easily. The importance of public
health
and
education
should be hardly fought by
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
as those can bring so
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
advantages in the future. To represent, the good medical
management
in Singapore
allow
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allows
show examples
many
people
from
neighbour
Replace the word
neighbouring
show examples
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
such
as Indonesia to go
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
there when they
got
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
illness
Add an article
an illness
the illness
show examples
.
Thus
in
therefore
Add the comma(s)
, therefore
show examples
, the
income
from medical treatment in Singapore had
a
Change the article
an
show examples
increase not only from local
people
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
from foreign. In conclusion,
while
some
people
can pay the medical
management
and
education
by themselves, I remain firmly convinced that those
things
should be managed by the
government
.
Submitted by alfathemaster on

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grammar
Try to proofread your essay to avoid minor grammatical errors and typos like "govrnment" (should be "government"), "are not the governments responsibility" (should be "are not the government's responsibility"), and "a disaster for them as the money acoount" (should be "a disaster for them as the money account").
content development
Aim to develop your arguments further by providing more specific and vivid examples. Your examples are relevant but could be expanded to make them more compelling.
language use
Improve sentence variety to enhance readability and engagement. Avoid repetitive sentence structures and try to use a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences.
structure
You clearly present both viewpoints and offer your own opinion, which is crucial for a complete task response.
structure
The introduction and conclusion are present and clear, effectively framing your essay.
content
You make a logical argument as to why the government should handle health care and education.
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