Art classes, such as painting and drawing are as important to a child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is
held
believed that painting and drawing Verb problem
apply
classes
play a vital role in developing a child similar to other courses, as they must be taught to students
in high schools. I certainly disagree with this
statement and will explain why by fairly discussing both positive and negative aspects.
On the one hand, participating in art
classes
, students
have opportunities not only to practice drawing but also
to widen their knowledge about artistry theory and history. For example
, students
from any
schools in Vietnam are taught about the popular sculptures and statues, which were built over 150 years ago in different Dynasty, Correct quantifier usage
apply
as a result
, they can both study new things and likely respect the cultures and customs, leading to a level up the awareness to preserve the beauty. Additionally
, it is acknowledged that art
courses can help the young stimulate their creativity and foster their thinking, which is helpful for high students
who force themselves to study hard for college exams. Furthermore
, doing artwork seems to be an interesting entertainment tool for pupils which helps them to release stress.
On the one hand, there are not many students
who sign up in
Change preposition
for
art
universities, so it is considered that taking part in art
classes
wastes so much time, as it can be spent on other crucial subjects, like Math and English. That is
the main reason why most high schools in Vietnam rarely organize art
classes
. Moreover
, art
teachers usually do not teach lessons clearly and carefully. If students
have dreams of studying at art
colleges, they will choose the cram courses outside the hall because the tutors are more professional.
In conclusion, although
there are significant benefits, the negative aspects of these classes
cannot be overlooked, they make the young waste time and less focus on crucial subjects.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your response addresses the topic and offers a balanced discussion of both positive and negative aspects. To improve, ensure that your introduction is clearer and free from grammatical errors. For example, 'It is held believed that...' can be corrected to 'It is widely believed that...'.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the cohesion between sentences and paragraphs. Using appropriate linking words and phrases can make your essay flow more smoothly. For instance, 'On the one hand' should only be used once, and the other side should begin with 'On the other hand'.
task achievement
Provide more specific and varied examples to support your main points. For instance, instead of general statements, use data or personal anecdotes.
coherence cohesion
To enhance the coherence and cohesion, try to ensure that each paragraph logically follows from the previous one. For example, the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be made smoother.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced view on the topic, clearly discussing both positive and negative aspects of making art classes compulsory.
coherence cohesion
There is a solid attempt at structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.