IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annyl income in 2007,2011,2015.

The chart below shows the number of households in the US by their annyl income in 2007,2011,2015.
#households #annyl #income
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar graph illustrates the
number
Use synonyms
 of American households
according to
Linking Words
 their annual salary in 2007, 2011, and 2015. One notable thing is that
two
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
 whose annual income didn’t exceed 50
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
dollars
Use synonyms
 totaled over 50
million
Use synonyms
 in 2007, with figures
25
Change preposition
of 25
show examples
million
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
 and roughly 28
million
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
, respectively. Meanwhile, it is obvious that the richest group showed the highest
number
Use synonyms
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
reaching almost 30
million
Use synonyms
. It is
also
Linking Words
 easy to observe that the
two
Use synonyms
 lowest salary
groups
Use synonyms
 had an increase in the population in 2011.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there was
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 dwindling
number
Use synonyms
 of the richest person.
However
Linking Words
, the total population of the
two
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
 (less than 49
million
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
) slightly decreased,
while
Linking Words
 the figure of the group who earned the money
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most surged to 33
million
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
 in 2015. In comparison,
two
Use synonyms
 middle salary
groups
Use synonyms
 (between 50
million
Use synonyms
 and 99
million
Use synonyms
dollars
Use synonyms
) remained the fourth and fifth throughout the period and there were not any big differences in
Use synonyms
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of the population.
Overall
Linking Words
, the data clearly shows that the richest and the most poor
housholds
Correct your spelling
households
 accounted for the majority in 2007, 2011, and 2015.
Submitted by jb22809467 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, two, groups, dollars, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: