Some say thatr advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Residents claim that advertisements are super successful at making us to purchase things,

however

, others think that commercials are so ordinary that

people

no longer pays particular notice to them. In my opinion, it depends on what the commercial is about and when we saw it. The primary reason is that, nowadays we can see advertisings all over the world. Companies try to come with new ideas and search different ways to make

people

buy things from them.

Additionally

, when we are using our electronical devices we can see advertisings and sometimes it makes us annoyed. So, in

this

kind of situations advertisements is just boring for

people

For example

while

we are watching movie from a random website suddenly a page can open and we can see some skippable or non-skippable ads and we are just waiting for when

this

ad will end, and it is not interesting for us anymore.

Nevertheless

while

we are watching TV some commercial can show up about a thing which is we are really curious about.

Moreover

, sometimes the commercial can be like short movies

for example

: it can be about how to send aid to the

people

who need it, and in commercial we can see about their

life

. It makes citizens notice how difficult the

life

actually is and we really appreciate it. All in all, ads can make our

life

more colorfull and may help us to notice some essential parts of humanity, nature, and

life

however

, the time and the way that they show it to us is really important.

Submitted by i.nureddinn on Tue May 21 2024

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task achievement

Although the essay addresses the prompt and provides a discussion of both views, it could be improved by providing more elaborate and specific examples.

clear comprehensive ideas

Enhance the explanations by providing specific instances and details that clearly reflect the impact and pervasiveness of advertisements.

coherence cohesion

There are notable spelling and grammatical errors, such as 'advertisings' instead of 'advertisements,' and 'electronical devices' instead of 'electronic devices.' Proofreading and refining sentence structures will improve clarity and coherence.

coherence cohesion

Providing a stronger conclusion will help to summarize the discussion and reinforce the main points of the essay. This enhances overall coherence and cohesion.

coherence cohesion

The essay maintains a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task achievement

The essay addresses both perspectives on the given topic, which is a strong point for task achievement.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

persuade
capture attention
emotional engagement
targeting techniques
tailor ads
preferences
celebrity endorsements
influencer marketing
psychological tactics
scarcity
urgency
ad fatigue
effectiveness
coping mechanisms
ad blockers
saturated markets
innovative strategies
traditional methods
digital media

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Some say thatr advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

now people complaint that they have difficulties getting enough sleep What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

many people are now opting to provide technology companies with their personal data in exchange for access for software Do the advantage of this outweigh the disadvanages?

Some people think that the purpose of education is to prepare individuals to be useful to society. Others, however, believe that the purpose of education is to prepare individuals to achieve personal ambitions.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.