Some people believe that once a person becomes a criminal, he will always be a criminal. Do you agree with this statement? Provide specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

In accordance with a segment of
society
, engaging in criminal activity can result in a permanent label for an individual.
However
, evolving perspectives, the implementation of strict penalties, and the receipt of support from
society
have led me to believe that individuals can emerge from the realm of criminal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
. The primary objective of government-implemented rehabilitation programs is to transform the mindsets of offenders, thereby reducing the likelihood of their engaging in illegal activities again. Through these programs, offenders are afforded the opportunity
to begin
anew and adopt more ethical
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
. A survey conducted in 2020 indicates that a significant number of criminals have undergone a change in their thought processes
while
participating in welfare events held in jail. Another reason for individuals to refrain from criminal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
is the harsh punishment imposed by prison authorities.
In addition
to challenging living conditions,
such
as a single hard bed, a
meager
Change the spelling
meagre
show examples
diet, and a small, spartan cell lacking luxury facilities, law-breakers are
also
required to perform unpaid
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
. These factors serve as a deterrent, teaching them a valuable lesson.
Furthermore
,
society
provides support to some criminals, allowing them to reintegrate into
society
after their punishment and work in various professions
while
building positive relationships with others.
As a result
, they become responsible citizens. In summary, there are differing opinions regarding the potential for criminals to transform into responsible citizens.
While
some individuals hold the belief that criminal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
is irreversible and that reform is impossible, I maintain that a shift in mindset, combined with societal support, can result in positive change for those who have served their punishment for criminal acts.
Submitted by kana_ayaki on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider expanding on the introduction to provide a more detailed background on the topic. Additionally, the conclusion could briefly restate the main points discussed in the body paragraphs to reinforce the argument.
coherence and cohesion
While the essay demonstrates clear and logical progression, varying the connectors and transitional phrases could further enhance the flow of ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Incorporate a wider range of vocabulary and complex sentence structures to elevate the overall quality of the essay and demonstrate a higher command of the English language.
coherence and cohesion
The essay presents a clear argument and maintains focus on the topic throughout.
task achievement
Good use of specific reasons and examples to support the main points, which adds depth to the argument.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay, providing a clear start and end to the discussion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rehabilitation
  • reintegration
  • recidivism
  • therapy
  • stigmatization
  • reoffending
  • accountability
  • support programs
  • proactive steps
  • personal choice
  • societal barriers
  • reform
  • transformation
  • opportunities
  • environment
  • social support
  • success stories
  • examples
  • criminal behavior
  • stereotype
What to do next:
Look at other essays: