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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph shows population variation in three wildlife species from 2011 to 2016 in North America and its coastal areas. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows population variation in three wildlife species from 2011 to 2016 in North America and its coastal areas. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#population #variation #three #wildlife #species #america #areas #information #features #comparisons
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The line graph illustrates the variety of three wild
animals
Change the noun form
animal
show examples
 types during the five years in the coastal areas of North America.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 there
were
Change the verb form
was
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 a high rise in
bears
Correct article usage
the bears
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 group, in the
meantime
Add a comma
meantime,
show examples
dolphins
Use synonyms
 went down significantly.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
whales
Use synonyms
 had
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 increase and decrease at the same time.
Firstly
Linking Words
, in 2011, the top-ranked one
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
dolphins
Use synonyms
 by 150000,
whereas
Linking Words
 the lowest result was shown by bears approximately 10000 species. In the middle of them were
whales
Use synonyms
 with 80000.
However
Linking Words
, in 2013,
bears
Correct article usage
the bears
show examples
 and
whales
Use synonyms
 went up to 10000, so they had an equal amount of animals,
meanwhile
Add a comma
meanwhile,
show examples
dolphins
Use synonyms
 had fallen dramatically.
Secondly
Linking Words
, in 2015,
dolphins
Use synonyms
 still had a decrease,
while
Linking Words
 remained two categories had a growth. In 2016, bears had a huge rise to 200000,
hence
Linking Words
 other two types went down
noticably
Correct your spelling
noticeably
, especially
dolphins
Use synonyms
 to 0, meanwhile
whales
Use synonyms
 to 50000.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words dolphins, whales with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "went down" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • population variation
  • wildlife species
  • coastal areas
  • trend
  • increase/decrease
  • stable
  • year-by-year analysis
  • significant changes
  • species-wise comparison
  • influence
  • climate change
  • human activities
  • conservation efforts
  • natural predation
  • inland areas
  • population trends
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