The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.
The figures illustrate
percentage
Add an article
the percentage
show examples
of households using three electrical appliances namely
refrigerator
Correct article usage
a refrigerator
show examples
, washing machine and vacuum cleaner to do
housework
and
other
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of
hours
in every home,
housework
per week
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
done from the year 1920 to 2019. The first figure says
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
of the households used washing
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
till 1940. After that,
Correct article usage
the refrigerator
show examples
refrigerator
Fix the agreement mistake
refrigerators
show examples
came into the picture which peaked in 1980 until
use
Add an article
the use
show examples
of
vacuum
Correct article usage
a vacuum
show examples
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
had a steady incline over
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
but was 100% as of the
refrigerator
in 2000. Later on, 100% remain
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
for both till 2019.
On the other hand
,
use
Correct article usage
the use
show examples
of washing had an increase till 1960
then
, reduced by 1980 and again rose to 63% by 2019. The second figure tells us from the year 1920 to 1980 there
has been
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
a significant decline from 50% to 15% in the
number
of
hours
of
housework
per week in one household
while
, it remains
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
till 2000.
Further
, from 2000 to 2019 in a span of 19 years the
number
of
hours
of
housework
reduced by 4% to 11%. In conclusion, the first chart depicts that over a span of
time
Add a comma
time,
show examples
people started using
Add an article
the refrigerator
show examples
refrigerator
Fix the agreement mistake
refrigerators
show examples
and vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
more often than washing
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
and the second chart shows us over the years the
number
of
hours
has remarkably decreased which signifies people are focusing less
to keep
Change preposition
on keeping
show examples
their residence clean and presentable
Submitted by nikitanalawade681 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words refrigerator, housework, number, hours with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "reduced" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "remain" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • electrical appliances
  • housework
  • time frame
  • variables
  • trends
  • significant milestones
  • turning points
  • correlation
  • reduction
  • influenced
  • societal implications
  • quality of life
  • gender roles
  • economic implications
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