art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to child's development as other susbjects, so it should be complusory in high schools. To what extent do you agree and disagree ?

Gifted
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
in schools
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
becoming
all-pervasive
Replace the word
more pervasive
show examples
in
this
modern world than ever before.
However
, there remains
certain
Correct article usage
a certain
show examples
discrepancy as to whether the total impacts of these art
classes
have been advantageous and
disavantangeous
Correct your spelling
disadvantageous
to the sustainable growth of civilized society.
Wherears
Correct your spelling
Whereas
many put forward
opposite
Correct article usage
the opposite
show examples
proposition,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
hold to the belief that the imperfectness of these
classes
is far outweighed by its
practicual
Correct your spelling
practical
benefits. first and foremost, the beneficial impacts that talent
subjects
have had on students are the things that should be considered seriously. Obviously, congenital talent courses can result in
improve
Replace the word
improvement in
show examples
their brains
also
soft skills
due to
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
more choices for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
in the future
as well as
reduce
Wrong verb form
reducing
show examples
the percentage of unemployment for
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
who
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
music
instructor
Fix the agreement mistake
instructors
show examples
or
painter
Fix the agreement mistake
painters
show examples
. it should be pointed out that learners may be fond of their talent courses because it is
easy
Replace the word
easier
show examples
to
learning
Change the form of the verb
learn
show examples
than science
subjects
like math,
physical
Fix the agreement mistake
physicals
show examples
and so on.
Furthermore
, one of the critical benefits associated with art
claases
Correct your spelling
classes
clauses
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
been the financial value that it
decrease
Change the verb form
decreases
show examples
the financial pressure on parents.
Via joining
Change preposition
Joining
show examples
a variety of
classes
may
spend
Verb problem
cost
show examples
quite less than
take
Change the verb form
taking
show examples
part in science
subjects
.
nevretheless
Correct your spelling
Nevertheless
, there is incontrovertible evidence that there are a wide range of particial
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
that these
lesson
Change the determiner
lessons
show examples
provide the family in general and art
classes
in particular
.
the
Capitalize word
The
show examples
remarkable feature of
this
form of
subjects
Fix the agreement mistake
subject
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
to offer a better understanding of the lifestyle of each one. BY dint of talents, people may have an opportunity to be aware of a wide range of self
as well as
community, which can help them choose the way to integrate into
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. It is true that
this
popular trend
also
generates entertainment value
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
people's
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
.
The
Correct article usage
A
show examples
number of products
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a meaningful storyline
such
as tet songs which
perfermace
Wrong verb form
are preferred
show examples
by
tradditional
Correct your spelling
traditional
musical instruments. to recapitulate, these
classes
with the excellent
aminities
Correct your spelling
amenities
that
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
offers
Correct subject-verb agreement
offer
show examples
human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
show examples
has
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
been a position of strength for the
evolutionar
Correct your spelling
evolutionary
development of the
state-oof-the-art-world
Correct your spelling
state-oof-the-art world
show examples
.
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task response
Try to present your main arguments more clearly in the introduction, and ensure they align well with the points discussed in the body paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance your logical structure by ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and flows smoothly from one idea to the next.
coherence and cohesion
Double-check grammar and spelling to reduce errors and improve readability, which significantly enhances coherence.
task response
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments, helping to illustrate your points more effectively.
task achievement
You have made an effort to discuss both the positive and negative impacts of art classes, which is a balanced approach.
coherence and cohesion
There is a clear attempt to provide a conclusion that summarizes your main points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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