Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.
Many
countries
want to explore space
to find out more about the universe. The problem is that this
is very expensive and there are other problems
that some people
think are more important so we should not spend so much money
on space
exploration
. I agree with this
but think that we should have more countries
working together to share space
exploration
.
There are a number of problems
facing the world today. Many people
are rich but there are some people
who don’t have accessable
to education, healthcare, food water and somewhere where they can liveCorrect your spelling
access
in
. Change preposition
apply
For
this
reason, to spend so much money
on exploring space
instead
of to solve
Change the verb form
solving
problems
on earth
Capitalize word
Earth
it
is a bad thing and I believe that we should be helping Correct pronoun usage
apply
people
on earth
first. Capitalize word
Earth
However
, there are definitely advantage
to Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
explore
Wrong verb form
exploring
space
. Many science
discoveries help Replace the word
scientific
people
in
Change preposition
on
earth
. Capitalize word
Earth
For
example
we would find new materials and Add a comma
example,
substation
that are made Fix the agreement mistake
substations
to
more medicine or products.
One solution is to share resources with other Change preposition
for
countries
. Lots of countries
have there
own Correct your spelling
their
space
centres and space
programs. This
is very expensive. If countries
shared these resource
Fix the agreement mistake
resources
then
space
exploration
would not cost as much money
and we would do more for
help Change preposition
to
people
on our planet.
in conclusion, I think that there are many problems
on earth
that we can solve and spending too much Capitalize word
Earth
money
on space
exploration
is a bad thing. However
, there are some advantages to going to space
and maybe countries
can help eachother
and share resources to go there.Correct your spelling
each other
Submitted by srsdy008 on
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task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion and responds directly to the prompt. However, expanding on the arguments further and providing more detailed examples would strengthen the response.
task achievement
Work on improving the clarity and depth of your ideas. Instead of just mentioning problems on Earth, elaborate on some specific issues and how the funds redirected from space exploration could address them.
coherence cohesion
The essay follows a logical structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, improving the transitions between ideas will help the flow of the essay, making it more coherent.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a main idea that is well-supported. For example, when discussing the advantages of space exploration, provide more detailed examples and explain their relevance clearly.
language
Focus on improving grammar and sentence structure to make your arguments clearer. Work on avoiding small errors, such as misplaced words and improper verb tenses, to enhance readability.
task achievement
The essay takes a clear stance on the issue and follows through with a structured argument.
task achievement
The suggestion of international cooperation in space exploration is a thoughtful and valuable point.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the introduction and conclusion is well-followed, with the main idea clearly stated and summed up effectively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.