Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission outweighthe diadvantages ?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Considering admission
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
show examples
would lead to some positive and negative aspects.
While
some
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
show examples
prefer to pull back the confirmation charge,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
would hold that positive points of charging for
entrance
would outcome the drawbacks. To start with, there are some disadvantages to considering a payment for museum
entrance
.
Firstly
, most
people
tend to spend their money on more
exiting
Correct your spelling
exciting
show examples
and sightseeing programs and charging them for admissions would discourage
the
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
, from visiting the
musueum
Correct your spelling
museum
.
For example
, if there were an equal cost for a museum
entrance
and
cinema
Correct article usage
a cinema
show examples
ticket for a famous movie, most
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
would choose
over
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the cinema, because they get more positive vibes.
Secondly
, as
people
pay taxes, they
except
Correct your spelling
accept
show examples
some social facilities for free and charging them for admission may bring deep negativity to the whole society.
Finally
, by considering
such
policies, fewer fold would go to visit
museums
and
museums
would lose their popularity among
people
. On the other
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
, there are several benefits of considering admission fees for
museums
. All
museums
have serious expenditures that need to be covered. By charging
people
a fair cost for a visit, both sides of the deal would be fulfilled.
Furthermore
,
according to
the extra income
though
Correct your spelling
through
show examples
entrance
fees,
museums
can
participates
Change the verb form
participate
show examples
in research projects and discover more about the history and
tradition
Replace the word
traditional
show examples
culture. To illustrate, when an academic discovery project needs a budget to start the process,
museums
can take part in
such
projects and advertise them to bring
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
more
people
to visit their new findings. In conclusion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
think the advantages of charging
people
for ammissione, like
partiticipating
Correct your spelling
participating
in detention projects or covering their expenditure, would outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by agostinoninonem on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear and single main idea. Try to develop each point further with more elaborate examples or explanations.
task achievement
Check for grammatical accuracy, including singular/plural forms, article usage, and verb tenses. This will help to improve clarity.
task achievement
Review spelling and typographical errors as these can distract from your argument and decrease your essay's readability.
task achievement
The essay includes both advantages and disadvantages, fulfilling the requirements of the prompt.
coherence cohesion
A clear conclusion summarizing your stance is present.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure is maintained through the use of paragraphs.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • admission fee
  • operational costs
  • funding new exhibits
  • visitor experience
  • accessibility
  • inclusivity
  • educational impact
  • cultural preservation
  • tiered pricing system
  • revenue generation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: