Some people think that children should start school at a very early age, but others believe that they should not go to school until they are older. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

One side of society supports that
parents
should send
children
to
studies
Replace the word
study
show examples
at an early age.
In contrast
, others believe that
this
trend may create
impact
Add an article
an impact
show examples
on kids,
thus
we should provide education as they get older. In my perspective, both ideas have
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
own merits and demerits on
kid
Correct article usage
the kid
show examples
growth factor . Nowadays, Society is giving more value to
studies
. Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
parents
want to join their
kid
Fix the agreement mistake
kids
show examples
in
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
as early as possible and it is one of
major
Correct pronoun usage
their major
show examples
dream
Fix the agreement mistake
dreams
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
Due to
this
type of thought process
may
Correct your spelling
many
show examples
parents
and
pupil’s
Change noun form
pupils
show examples
have some advantages.
For instance
, a
boy
Change noun form
boy's
show examples
or a
girl
Change noun form
girl's
show examples
knowledge, grasping power, and area of interest can be observed at
initial
Add an article
the initial
show examples
level. So that, we can train them in
appropriate
Add an article
an appropriate
show examples
manner to reach their dreams.
In contrast
to early schooling,
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
other
Change the wording
another
show examples
side of
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
suggest
Change the verb form
suggests
show examples
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
not to force on kid
studies
at
Change preposition
during
show examples
their joyful period and advise
to educate
Change the verb form
educating
show examples
them as become older.
This
opinion
also
can be
support
Wrong verb form
supported
show examples
up to
certain
Correct article usage
a certain
show examples
level, Because, If we apply
early
Correct article usage
an early
show examples
settlement policy on
children
, it may affect
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their mental health
due to
academic pressures.
Instead
of that, we can give freedom to enjoy and teach
a basic things
Correct the article-noun agreement
basic things
a basic thing
show examples
in our home.
However
, it may affect on pupil’s future
setellement
Correct your spelling
settlement
, because of late
studies
as
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
experienced.
Overall
,
parents
should think about
kids
Change noun form
kids'
kid's
show examples
academics
as well as
for their freedom.
However
, by taking good care of
children
in both ways, we can develop in their
studies
as well
other
Correct word choice
as other
show examples
moments. In my opinion, we must educate
children
at least from age five.
Submitted by sivareddymarella6 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear and focused thesis statement in the introduction to outline your viewpoint effectively.
task achievement
Work on developing your paragraphs with more specific examples and detailed explanations to strengthen your arguments.
clear comprehensive ideas
Pay attention to grammar and sentence structure to improve clarity and readability. Consider sentence variety to make your writing more engaging.
complete response
You have made a good effort in presenting both views and giving your opinion, which is essential for discussing the topic comprehensively.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in making the structure of your essay understandable.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive development
  • social skills
  • learning disabilities
  • natural development
  • family bonding
  • competitive edge
  • formal education
  • Scandinavian countries
  • academic performance
  • balanced approach
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