parents should be required to attend parenting courses every year to bring up their children well and give them a better environment for growth ? To what extent do you agree or disagree ?
There is a request that
parents
nowadays ought to participate in parenting courses
annually in order to nourish their children
in the right way. I strongly agree with this
perspective due to
the reasons for preventing domestic violence
and closer distance between family members .
The most advantageous factor of attending parenting classes is avoiding domestic violence
.In some societies, many underprivileged parents
who cannot access education may find it challenging to raise their kids or even bring them up in the wrong way. As a result
, they do not how to control their anger when their children
commit a foul which leads to family violence
. Thus
, participating in parenting courses
is an effective solution to prevent these potential wrongdoings. For instance
, more and more pregnant in European countries are likely to enrol in some programmes that provide parental skills.
Another benefit of parenting courses
is narrowing the generation gap between parents
and their kids. In other words
, through attending lessons for parents
, those adults are able to comprehend their children
profoundly as they can sympathize with their pupils' feelings, share their hobbies together so as to ease the distance between two different generations as well as
build up a tight-knit family. Therefore
, the relationship among family members becomes closer. According to
BBC News, about 60% of family bonds were improved after parents
had enrolled in parenting classes.
In conclusion, by parents
attendance in parenting courses
, family violence
can be prevented and the distance between parents
and their children
can be narrowed.Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on
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task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear stance. However, broadening the scope of your arguments and providing more elaborate examples would strengthen your position. Consider addressing potential counterarguments or perspectives as well.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay can be improved by ensuring smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Each point should be clearly linked to the main thesis introduced in the introduction. Additionally, introductions to subsequent points can be made more explicit.
task achievement
Ensure your main points are supported with more specific examples and details. This will help make your arguments more convincing. For example, when discussing domestic violence, include statistics or studies to illustrate your point.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a well-defined introduction and conclusion, which helps in summarizing the main points clearly.
task achievement
The examples provided, such as enrolling in programs in European countries and the statistic from BBC News, are relevant and support the arguments to some extent.