parents should be required to attend parenting courses every year to bring up their children well and give them a better environment for growth ? To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

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There is a request that
parents
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nowadays ought to participate in parenting
courses
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annually in order to nourish their
children
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in the right way. I strongly agree with
this
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perspective
due to
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the reasons for preventing domestic
violence
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and closer distance between family members . The most advantageous factor of attending parenting classes is avoiding domestic
violence
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.In some societies, many underprivileged
parents
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who cannot access education may find it challenging to raise their kids or even bring them up in the wrong way.
As a result
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, they do not how to control their anger when their
children
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commit a foul which leads to family
violence
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.
Thus
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, participating in parenting
courses
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is an effective solution to prevent these potential wrongdoings.
For instance
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, more and more pregnant in European countries are likely to enrol in some programmes that provide parental skills. Another benefit of parenting
courses
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is narrowing the generation gap between
parents
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and their kids.
In other words
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, through attending lessons for
parents
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, those adults are able to comprehend their
children
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profoundly as they can sympathize with their pupils' feelings, share their hobbies together so as to ease the distance between two different generations
as well as
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build up a tight-knit family.
Therefore
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, the relationship among family members becomes closer.
According to
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BBC News, about 60% of family bonds were improved after
parents
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had enrolled in parenting classes. In conclusion, by
parents
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attendance in parenting
courses
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, family
violence
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can be prevented and the distance between
parents
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and their
children
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can be narrowed.
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task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear stance. However, broadening the scope of your arguments and providing more elaborate examples would strengthen your position. Consider addressing potential counterarguments or perspectives as well.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay can be improved by ensuring smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Each point should be clearly linked to the main thesis introduced in the introduction. Additionally, introductions to subsequent points can be made more explicit.
task achievement
Ensure your main points are supported with more specific examples and details. This will help make your arguments more convincing. For example, when discussing domestic violence, include statistics or studies to illustrate your point.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a well-defined introduction and conclusion, which helps in summarizing the main points clearly.
task achievement
The examples provided, such as enrolling in programs in European countries and the statistic from BBC News, are relevant and support the arguments to some extent.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Developmental Milestones
  • Nurturing
  • Parent-child Rapport
  • Non-violent Discipline
  • Child Welfare
  • Empathy
  • Cognitive Growth
  • Pedagogical Support
  • Resilience
  • Socioeconomics
  • Family Dynamics
  • Adolescent Psychology
  • Behavioral Patterns
  • Proactive Parenting
  • Contemporary Issues
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