Some people think that development of technology helps to reduce crime, while others think that it encourages crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

A group of individuals claim that some improvements in terms of technology assist in declining the figures of criminality. Other people contend that it could be
enhance
Wrong verb form
enhanced
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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.From my point of view, modern technological devices have diminished the percentage of crime situations over the past decades. First of all, it is undeniable that, in the contemporary world, technology has seen
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
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positive evolution.
Also
, it significantly
influenced
Wrong verb form
influences
show examples
every situation in our lives.
Following
this
approach, several devices were discovered that play a key role in determining all crimes and
thiefs
Correct your spelling
thefts
immediately.
For instance
, it is noticeable that, approximately everywhere, you can see cameras that are controlled by professional IT specialists. The primary reason for
that is
to solve all crime situations thanks to them.From my perspective, it can be considered beneficial and safe for our society.
Secondly
, in the 21st century, scammers don't make an effort to commit crimes in real life. More precisely, they try to implement it through online websites.
For example
, they are making an attempt to steal someone's personal details and utilizing them to receive money from the bank. The exact name is cyberattack, which is popular nowadays with unbelievably many accidents. The exact purpose of them is to destroy people's data and create some
troubles
Fix the agreement mistake
trouble
show examples
in their lives.
Moreover
, it may be regarded as the main drawback of the advancement of technology.
Nevertheless
, being careful, I hope no one will witness situations like that.
To sum up
, I reckon that technological growth is advantageous for our community in terms of lowering the proportion of criminality.
However
, we can see some cyberattacks on our bank accounts or personal information.
Therefore
, we should always take precautions before facing these accidents.
Submitted by nejla.abdullayeva on

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coherence cohesion
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Elaborate more on the examples and explain their relevance to your arguments. This will make your essay more convincing.
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Proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings. This will increase your overall clarity.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the discussion nicely.
task achievement
The topic is addressed from both perspectives, providing a balanced view.
task achievement
The essay touches upon important issues like cyberattacks and the role of technology in reducing crime.

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