Some people believe that children’s leisure activities must be educational, otherwise they are acomplete waste of time. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

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In today's fast-changing world, many issues spark strong debates and different opinions among experts and the general public. One
such
topic divides people, with some supporting its benefits and others pointing out its downsides.
This
essay will look at both sides of the argument and argue that, despite some concerns, the benefits greatly outweigh the drawbacks, providing significant advantages to society.
Submitted by sara.albalushi1993 on

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task achievement
Your introduction is very general and does not address the specific topic of whether children's leisure activities must be educational. Make sure to clearly state your position on this particular issue.
task achievement
Ensure that you provide relevant specific examples to support your arguments. For instance, give examples of non-educational activities that benefit children or instances where educational activities have positively impacted them.
task achievement
Develop clear and comprehensive ideas by elaborating on both the educational and non-educational aspects of children's activities. This will provide a balanced view and strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay should maintain a logical structure. Start with a clear thesis statement, followed by supporting paragraphs that provide arguments and examples, and conclude with a summary of your position.
coherence cohesion
Introduce and conclude your essay effectively, ensuring that your conclusion summarizes the main points and reinforces your position on the topic.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph should focus on a single idea, helping to maintain the logical flow of the essay. Use transition words and phrases to link sentences and paragraphs smoothly.
task achievement
You have introduced the topic and indicated that you will discuss both sides of the argument, which is a good starting point.
coherence cohesion
Your language is clear and direct, making it easy for the reader to follow your thoughts.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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