It is common that in many companies people from different ages work together in a same team. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantges?

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In a company always can easily find
adifferent
Correct your spelling
a different
different

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age
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

employees working in
same
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the same

It appears that the phrase same department does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

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department, which is common in every
occuration
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occupation

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and country. In
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay, I will discuss about upside of working with people who
not
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are not

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the same
age
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

as you and
downside
Correct article usage
the downside

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of staying with different generations. When Human
Resource
Fix the agreement mistake
Resources

It seems that Resource may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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announced
Wrong verb form
announces

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb announced. Consider changing it.

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position
Correct article usage
a position

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hirin
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hiring

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, work experience usually
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is

It seems that the verb are does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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more important than
age
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it is easy to meet people who
not
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are not

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in
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apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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your
age
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to
working
Change the form of the verb
work

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb working. Consider changing it.

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with, to be more exact, different work experience individuals to be with. Huamn's thinking logic and perspectives changed
by
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as

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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times and things happened. Once
thise
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those
these
this

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workers who do not have
same
Correct article usage
the same

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background working together will create new ideas after some
harshy
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harsh
harshly

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discussion.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, depends on the ratio of
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages

It seems that age may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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in
same
Change the article
the same

It appears that the phrase same team does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

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team will lead the thoughts to another way when voting for
new
Add an article
a new

The noun phrase new direction seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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direction on work. When different generations meet up, they feel
be
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb be appears to be unnecessary here.

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offended by other perspectives which not agree with,
nevertheless
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, those same
ageswill
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ages will
pages will

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start being
stuborn
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stubborn

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on
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in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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thoughts,
Linking Words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

however
Add a comma
however,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase however. Consider adding a comma.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

disadvantage can be resolved by
supervisor
Correct article usage
the supervisor

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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or team leader who
be
Correct subject-verb agreement
is

It seems that the verb be does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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chargedin
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charged in
charged

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the team.
As
Change preposition
From

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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my perspective, it is always a good way to have a chance
working
Change the verb form
to work

Working doesn’t seem to work here.

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with
difference
Add an article
a difference
the difference

The noun phrase difference seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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of
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages

It seems that age may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. in sum, cooperation with
difference
Add an article
a difference
the difference

The noun phrase difference seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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of
age
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

employeesis
Correct your spelling
employees is
employees

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the best way in any company which advantage
is outweigh
Change the verb form
is outweighed

It appears that the form of the verb outweigh does not work with is in this sentence.

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Add an article
the disadvantage
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disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages

It seems that disadvantage may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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.
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task achievement
You have addressed the topic and presented both the advantages and disadvantages of working with people of different ages. This shows a clear understanding of the task. However, it would be beneficial to provide more relevant examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay follows a logical progression, but the paragraphs could be better organized, with clearer topic sentences and better transitions between ideas. This will enhance the overall coherence of your writing.
coherence and cohesion
You have an introduction and a conclusion, which is good. However, try to make your conclusion more detailed, summarizing the main points discussed in your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay includes main points, but they need more detailed support. To improve your essay, provide specific examples and further explanation to back up each point.
task achievement
There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as "working in same department," "position hirin," and "be chargedin the team." Reviewing these aspects and improving your sentence structure will create a smoother reading experience.
task achievement
Try to use more varied vocabulary and sentence structures to make your essay more engaging. For instance, instead of repeating "disadvantage," you can use synonyms or rephrase the sentences.
task achievement
Your essay clearly addresses the topic by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of working with people from different ages, which shows a good understanding of the task.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your discussion effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Diverse perspectives
  • Innovation
  • Mentorship
  • Professional growth
  • Institutional knowledge
  • Work environment
  • Energy
  • Willingness to take risks
  • Work dynamics
  • Age-related stereotypes
  • Resistance to change
  • Technological advancements
  • Productivity
  • Efficiency
  • Work-life balance
  • Career progression
  • Job security
  • Stable routine
What to do next:
Look at other essays: