Buying things on internet such as books Sir ticket and groceries is becoming more and more popular .Fo advantages of shopping this way outweigh the disadvantage.
Nowadays, many people claim that buying things on
Internet
is more convenient than going out shopping because in Add an article
the Internet
this
day and age
the Add a comma
age,
numurous
of the nation doesn'Correct your spelling
numerous
t
have much time to go shopping or do any relaxing activities. So, online shopping is the better choice for them. The following essay takes on both arguments.
To begin
with, most societies don't
have enough time to spend shopping or some products are not in countries. Therefore
, online shopping is easy and responds to people's needs, they don't
have to buy an airline ticket to buy a product that they need, it
can save time and money. Correct word choice
and it
Furthermore
, several online shops always have discount codes or promotions for every festival thus
, it advantageous
for customers.
Add a missing verb
is advantageous
However
, sometimes stealing money is supper simple to do when buying anything on intrnets
becauseCorrect your spelling
internets
internet
,
Remove the comma
apply
public
can'Add an article
the public
t
check credit to be reliable even, they much
try to check it or in the worst Correct your spelling
must
case
it can use your personal information in the shop that you are members to use in the wrong ways.
In conclusion, it has positive more than negative Add a comma
case,
although
, Capitalize word
Although
public
may encounter a store that steals your money or do anything Add an article
the public
that is
mentioned before but just small
chance Correct article usage
a small
to
Change preposition
of
encountering
it.Change the form of the verb
encounter
Submitted by np.napatping on
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task achievement
Your essay does provide a clear stance and discusses both advantages and disadvantages of online shopping. However, the grammar and vocabulary could be improved for better clarity. In particular, pay attention to subject-verb agreement and proper usage of tenses.
task achievement
The ideas in your essay are clear, but some of them are not fully developed or explained in detail. Try to elaborate more on each point with specific examples or further explanations. For example, when discussing promotions and discounts, you could mention specific instances where this has been beneficial.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure, but transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be smoother. Use more linking words like "Furthermore," "Moreover," or "On the other hand" to improve the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Be mindful of using varying sentence structures to avoid redundancy and keep the reader engaged. Try to use a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences.
introduction conclusion present
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the essay well.
complete response
You have identified and addressed both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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