Some people believe that online study is more effective that on campus while others disagree. Discuss both the disadvantages and advantages of online study.
In recent times almost all of the tasks were switched to online
mode
. To continue schooling, teachers started teaching students
through online classes. It is believed by some people that going to the
school is more effective way than some disagree. Correct article usage
apply
This
essay will belief out advantages and disadvantages of these online lessons.
There could be many drawbacks of online mode
. Firstly
, the routine of going early to bed and waking up early is hard for some students
. As a result
of
these children are getting lazy, are irresponsible. Change preposition
apply
Secondly
, they are missing their activities such
as playing with their friends. In addition
to, this
they are losing their freedom of going out in a fresh and open environment. Therefore
, they are becoming more and more aggresive
towards many situations. An example of Correct your spelling
aggressive
this
could be the dull faces of children throughout the day.
Classes can be taken from anywhere without going to school, is
the main advantage of Correct pronoun usage
which is
this
online mode
. Students
can travel anywhere,
and can attend their schooling. Remove the comma
apply
Such
as you can visit a park and could
be present in the class simultaneously. Meanwhile, the lectures could be reviewed anytime, since classes were in an online Verb problem
apply
mode
. Thus
, enabling students
to brush up on their content. For instance
, watching the Zoom recorded the lecture.
To conclude
, this
online way is equally beneficial and harmful in some aspects. This
mode
of education is harmful to students
from the physical health from out of point. On the other hand
, it's helpful in exam times to brush up on the content.Submitted by nejla.abdullayeva on
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task achievement
The essay adequately discusses both the advantages and disadvantages of online study. However, the explanation of the disadvantages lacks depth and specificity in some areas. For example, the claim that online study results in children becoming more aggressive could be supported with more concrete evidence or examples.
coherence cohesion
Try to use clearer transitions between ideas to improve the overall coherence of the essay. Words and phrases such as 'furthermore' or 'on the other hand' can help guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Certain sentences are awkwardly constructed or unclear. Focus on improving sentence structure and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one. For instance, 'As a result of these children are getting lazy, are irresponsible' could be more clearly stated as 'As a result, some students may become lazy and irresponsible.'
task achievement
You have provided relevant points for both advantages and disadvantages of online study, which shows a balanced understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has an introduction and a conclusion, which helps in structuring your response. This is good as it gives a clear beginning and an end to your essay.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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