the first car appeared on Britsh roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of trasport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that automobile ownership went up dramatically over the
last
three decades. It automatically leads to
traffic
congestion
in cities in many countries of the world. We cannot limit the number of
car
possessions to deal with
this
issue.
Therefore
, the
government
should think about some solutions to persuade
people
to refrain from using their own transport in order to reduce the
traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
. The demand for
car
purchase has increased remarkably and it makes
car
companies produce and release a high number of
cars
production as well. Simultaneously, the
government
does not provide equitable infrastructures,
such
as street space and alternative motorways.
Consequently
, it is normal that
traffic
congestion
happens because the number of
cars
is not proportional to the facility provided. Another reason is that the price of
cars
is affordable and
people
can get a
car
easily. In my opinion, there are several actions that
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
can take to settle
this
complicated problem.
Firstly
, whilst the vehicle companies produce their
cars
, the
government
should build and develop the road infrastructure in order to give enough space for many vehicles to minimise the
congestion
of
traffic
.
Secondly
, the
government
can collaborate with
car
companies in producing small smart
cars
. The advancement of technology today is sufficient to create innovation in
car
production.
Last
but not least
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
government
should provide many alternative
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
for the public
such
as trans-city buses, sky trains, and underground trains which offer better, safer, faster and more affordable transportation facilities.
As a result
,
people
will tend to choose public
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
than using their own
cars
.
Therefore
, the
traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
will substantially
reduce
Wrong verb form
reduced
show examples
.
To conclude
,
car
possession could not be circumscribed by restricting
people
from buying it, as evident in the
last
three decades. Rather more effective ways to tackle the heinous
traffic
congestion
are there that
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
might select to tackle that issue.
Submitted by shaikha.alsaif4 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
In your writing, it might be helpful to include more specific examples or case studies to support your points. For instance, you could research and mention specific cities or countries where certain transportation policies have been successful.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to word choice and ensure clarity. Some sentences can feel a bit awkward or unclear. For example, 'it makes car companies produce and release a high number of cars production as well' could be refined for better readability.
introduction
Your introduction provides a good overview of the issue and lays the groundwork for your argument.
task achievement
You offer several potential solutions to the problem of traffic congestion, demonstrating a problem-solving approach.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: