IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

in many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than produced locally. why people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage poeple to buy local food?

#countries #people #food #poeple
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In many parts of the world, the number of people who purchase foreign cuisine tends to become higher than those who prefer to utilize local food.
This
Linking Words
 is a result of the perceived quality and safety standards of imported products. In order to attract residents to homemade food, people need to promote awareness of the benefits of local goods. There is no doubt that international refreshments always have better condition than domestic ones.
In other words
Linking Words
, importing a product is a complicated process which is verified carefully by the government;
as a result
Linking Words
, it makes a sense of security
as well as
Linking Words
 delicious tastes for consumers.
For example
Linking Words
, in Vietnam,
although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 has a developing agriculture, Vietnamese residents still choose to buy Kiwi from New Zealand
due to
Linking Words
 the fact that there is a high number of preservatives in fruit made in Vietnam.
Therefore
Linking Words
, international goods attract the majority of consumers and lead to the current tendency.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 case can be solved by more investment in enhancing the quality of local cuisine. The government should prove the assurances that their products are fresher and more affordable. Not only the safety level but
also
Linking Words
 the prices will be a crucial factor because
this
Linking Words
 will encourage citizens to use homemade dishes and cut down on the budget spent on delivery. In conclusion, more and more people spend money on buying overseas cuisine because of its high condition;
nevertheless
Linking Words
, local authorities should pay a fortune to develop the safety
as well as
Linking Words
 the beliefs of citizens.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider elaborating on how promoting local food benefits the community and economy, this could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Pay more attention to sentence structure and vocabulary choice to avoid awkward phrasing.
coherence cohesion
Improve the transition between paragraphs for better flow.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and sets up the essay effectively.
supported main points
The essay provides relevant examples to support your main points, like the example of Vietnamese residents buying Kiwi from New Zealand.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the essay while also reiterating your main arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: