Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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People
have different views about how a
person
could succeed in his or her life.
While
some individuals argue that finding a job immediately after high school is a better option, I personally agree with those who believe that education is the key to finding a better occupation. It is true that sometimes it might be better for youngsters to get a job as soon as they finish school.
Firstly
, the market labour might have a competitive atmosphere and some steps need to be taken in order to reach a reasonable salary. A
person
who enters the working labour should respect the hierarchy and fight with other competitors to be able to get a promotion.
As a result
, a school-graduated
person
who starts his or her occupation immediately after school might have a chance to overcome the professional hierarchy and get a better job position after some years.
Secondly
, having more work experience might be more useful than a
university
degree. Nowadays, employers tend to have skilled employees rather than educated ones, because today
people
can easily buy a valid certification. So, being professional in a task and having years of experience would be the better option.
However
, I agree with those who feel following a subject at
university
is the major factor of success.
To begin
with, our world is facing an intellectual problem because the majority of
people
do not have sufficient knowledge, they just depend on websites or blogs. The
university
forces young generations to raise their information and present their own opinions
instead
of copying others from the internet. As a matter of fact, there is a huge difference between a
person
with a
university
education and others, and
this
difference will guarantee his or her success.
Besides
, the
university
not only increases students’ scientific information but
also
teaches them social manners. Youngsters are taught the ways of communicating with
the
Change the word
their
show examples
professors and their classmates. The professional communication skills will help them to have a better relationship with their managers and colleagues. In conclusion,
although
many
people
suppose that working is the most important factor in gaining wealth, I assume that having a
university
degree will lead us to have more revenue in our career.
Submitted by Negar_seddigh on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure your main arguments are clearly linked to the topic sentence of each paragraph. This will help improve the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more persuasive and help you achieve a higher score.
task achievement
Try to refine and clarify your ideas to ensure they are fully comprehensive and easy to understand.
coherence cohesion
Your essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument effectively.
task achievement
You provide a full response to the task, addressing both sides of the argument and giving your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Academic qualifications
  • Specialized skills
  • In-depth knowledge
  • Personal growth
  • Social development
  • Practical experience
  • Financial independence
  • Career progression
  • Professional networking
  • Education
  • Work experience
  • Successful career
  • Personal interests
  • Career goals
  • Decision-making process
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