In some cities, public parks and open spaces are changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do you think the benefits outweigh the disadvantages?

Presently, some public parks in cities and empty
black
Fix the agreement mistake
blacks
show examples
are allowed to grow vegetables and
fruit
from local
resident
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residents
show examples
. The writer means
hat
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
it is very good if
people
do
this
work
in public places because
people
can consume fresh
product
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products
show examples
and connect to
people
, but it has some
problem
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problems
show examples
like
people
are difficult to manage thief, bad guys. It is vital to see that
people
will
be eaten
Wrong verb form
eat
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fresh
fruit
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fruits
show examples
and vegetables which they grow. In fact, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
companies
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the companies
show examples
both
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
use
pesticide
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pesticides
show examples
for
vegetable
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vegetables
show examples
and
fruit
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fruits
show examples
to maintain
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
profit, so
we
Rephrase
when we
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go to
market
Correct article usage
the market
show examples
, it
sure
Add a missing verb
is sure
show examples
that we will buy vegetables which
got
Wrong verb form
have had
show examples
pesticide
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pesticides
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before.
However
,
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the pesticide
a pesticide
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pesticide
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pesticides
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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not totally unhealthy, it is so convenient and
help
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helps
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companies to raise
effeciency
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efficiency
, but it will be better if we grow by
us
Correct pronoun usage
ourselves
show examples
.
In
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On
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the other hand, we must accept that it is very difficult to manage, no one
want
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wants
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their garden
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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destroyed. The largest problem is public places, because
park
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parks
show examples
always have a lot of
persons
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people
show examples
, they may put their feet in your garden despite their
careless
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carelessness
show examples
.
Furthermore
,
he
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
thief will steal your vegetable and
fruit
, it is really
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
bad
work
. In my opinion, I think we should keep creating more
greenspaces
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green spaces
show examples
by using public spaces. Not only
people
can get fresh food
everyday
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every day
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, but
also
this
work
help
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helps
show examples
improving
Wrong verb form
improve
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interaction
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the interaction
show examples
between
people
.
Recording
Verb problem
According
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to my experience,
people
depend on
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the internet
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
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to communicate, so
this
work
will give a part of positivity
for
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to
show examples
society.
To conclude
, it is really good if public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens for
people
to grow, but
this
work
still
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
lots of problems. In my mind, it will improve our society.
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task achievement
Your response covers both the benefits and disadvantages of converting public parks and spaces into gardens. However, there are some areas where clarity is lacking. Focus on articulating your ideas more clearly and concisely. For example, ensuring subject-verb agreement and proper usage of articles can significantly improve the readability of your essay.
coherence cohesion
While the logical structure of your argument is generally clear, some points feel underdeveloped. Consider expanding on how growing one's own vegetables could improve community connections, perhaps through examples or hypothetical scenarios. Additionally, addressing counterarguments more thoroughly can strengthen your position.
task achievement
You provide a clear introduction that outlines your main points regarding both the advantages and disadvantages of community gardening in public spaces.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes a conclusion that reinforces your main argument, advocating for the benefits despite the challenges, which provides a cohesive end to your response.
coherence cohesion
Your willingness to address both sides of the argument demonstrates an understanding of the complexity of the issue, which is commendable and adds depth to your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Urban Agriculture
  • Community Engagement
  • Social Interaction
  • Physical Exercise
  • Mental Relaxation
  • Fresh Produce
  • Sustainability
  • Biodiversity
  • Carbon Footprint
  • Air Quality
  • Educational Opportunities
  • Horticulture
  • Teamwork
  • Sustainable Living
  • Food Security
  • Locally-grown
  • Nutritious
  • Neighborhood Bonds
  • Urban Sustainability
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