In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
In many urban areas, open spaces and public parks are being repurposed into gardens so that local
people
can use them to plant their own vegetables
and fruit. This
writer is of the opinion that self-product
and Correct your spelling
self-producing
connect
Wrong verb form
connecting
people
together outweigh any drawbacks such
as waste
time and less land for Replace the word
wasting
people
’s daily activities.
It is vital to understand that people
still now buying
food and Wrong verb form
buy
vegetables
outside and have concerns about its
safety. Correct pronoun usage
their
This
is because most of the vegetables
and fruits nowadays is
filled with pesticides or Change the verb form
are
being
genetically modified. With Wrong verb form
are
this
new plan, residents can grow it in gardens, take care it
by themselves and enjoy their achievements. Change preposition
of it
As a result
, quality
of food to consume can be increased because did not use any pesticides or fertilizers that Correct article usage
the quality
creates
Change the verb form
create
toxic
Replace the word
toxins
to
the environment. Change preposition
in
Hence
, removing the doubts from consumers to create a healthy habit.
However
, many people
think that this
is unnecessary as people
find high quality
products in many supermarkets around the world. They believe that because the Add a hyphen
high-quality
high quality
fruit and Add a hyphen
high-quality
vegetables
is
in places where Change the verb form
are
examination
take place before entering the supermarket, Fix the agreement mistake
examinations
these
free space needs to be used for citizens Correct determiner usage
this
will
lose their Correct pronoun usage
who will
spaces
to do exercises or rest. Fix the agreement mistake
space
This
is a valid point but through planting grocery products, the community can create a strong sense of unity through how to grow fruit, avoid
Correct word choice
and avoid
phenomenon
that Add an article
the phenomenon
young
generation Correct article usage
the young
do
not know anything about agriculture skills. Correct subject-verb agreement
does
Consequently
, this
foster
the Change the verb form
fosters
people
connecting to each other and help
youngsters learn agriculture knowledge.
Taking everything into account, Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
replace
public parks Wrong verb form
replacing
by
gardens can help civilians a lot in saving money, Change preposition
with
comprehend
new knowledge and Wrong verb form
comprehending
also
link
citizens together. It is true that drawbacks can harm our life but if we know utilize all the benefits of Wrong verb form
linking
this
plan.Submitted by [email protected]
on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Ensure that every main point is developed fully with clear examples and explanations. This will help to strengthen your argument and make your essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving paragraph transitions to enhance the flow of your essay. Better use of linking words and phrases can improve coherence.
general
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity and comprehension. Simple mistakes can hinder the overall effectiveness of your writing.
task achievement
The essay attempts to address both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach and critical thinking.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present, providing a framework for the essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses a relevant and contemporary issue, showing an understanding of community needs and concerns.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.