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Band 4

In the past when students did a university degree they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays they have morw opportunity to study abroad. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#students #university #study #country #morw #opportunity
In the contemporary era, many graduate
students
 are flying
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad for
further
 studies in comparison with the past time.
This
 essay will argue that despite
country's
Correct article usage
the country's
show examples
economy
Replace the word
economic
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will
Verb problem
apply
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decline,there are countless opportunities and
well-established
Correct article usage
a well-established
show examples
 atmosphere for the youth.
To begin
 with,there are plenty of benefits to
study
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studying
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
foreign countries. First and foremost is that plethora
chances
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of chances
show examples
. It has been noticed that many developed nations open their gates
for
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to
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 healthcare and IT sector people with handsome pay scales.
Therefore
, many
students
 are attracted to study,work and settle in these nations.
For instance
, Canada is providing a special pathway for
the
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apply
show examples
medical
students
 from around the globe to settle in their
nation
 to support
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 growth.
Moreover
,another significant benefit is modern technology with more
rely
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reliance
show examples
 on practical skills. Some economically strong countries are more
focusing
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focused
show examples
 on practicals rather than theories.
Apart from
this
,they have
latest
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the latest
show examples
 devices to teach their learners.
For example
,many top universities
in
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apply
show examples
the
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apply
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abroad are using
the
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apply
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smart
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
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 for
better
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a better
show examples
 understanding of their
students
.
However
,migrating to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 foreign
nation
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 cons. The
nation
,from where graduates move,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
find
Correct subject-verb agreement
finds
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decline
Add an article
a decline
the decline
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 in their economy,because youth are the foundation of
future
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the future
show examples
 and if they migrate to different regions,it will create
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 negative impact on the growth of their
nation
.
To conclude
, the younger generation is looking for the opportunities,which are provided by well-developed nations in terms of handsome salaries and digital education,
while
 it makes decline in the financial system of the country,
from
Change preposition
's
show examples
students
are going
Verb problem
apply
show examples
.
Submitted by pp6859 on

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grammar
Work on sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity.
example
Try to include more specific examples to support your points effectively.
organization
Organize your ideas more clearly to enhance coherence and cohesion.
introduction conclusion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion.
task completion
You provided specific benefits and drawbacks, addressing both sides of the argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural exposure
  • Personal growth
  • Cultural sensitivity
  • Adaptability
  • Educational resources
  • Prestigious institutions
  • Networking
  • Global network
  • Career opportunities
  • Independence
  • Self-reliance
  • Problem-solving
  • Time management
  • Language skills
  • Global job market
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