IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people prefer to live in a small town. Others prefer to live in a big city. Which place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer. Do you agree or disagree

#people #town #city #place #support
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A substantial number of individuals believe that living in a small town is the superior strategy for life, but other societies presume that a big city is a better place.
However
, recent research has shown that small towns can play an absolutely critical role for healthy in community, and a big city would be far more beneficial for people living them. I am a strong advocate of
this
 approach, and the benefits of it will be covered in
this
 essay. I want to list some reasons referring to support small locations to consider them a possible place to live
in
Change preposition
apply
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. I live in a
distinct
Correct your spelling
district
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 which is located quite far from the centre of the town. Every day, many people work, study, or travel in big cities travel from other cities so they
Add a missing verb
are excite
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excite
Replace the word
excited
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 crowded, and polite;
for example
, when researchers in Oxford researched stress between two communities they illustrated
in
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that
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big
Correct article usage
a big
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citie’s
Correct your spelling
cities
city’s
 population causes stress.
On the other hand
, Big towns
such
 as Moscow, New York, and others are
favored
Change the spelling
favoured
show examples
 by the world with the best conditions that they can provide for their citizens.
For example
, there is no trouble with supplying electricity, accommodation, and public places. Medicine is available, and food consumption too, meanwhile, these facilities force the people living in small regions to move on to be able to use them.
To conclude
, my objective point is that despite the acceptability of small in size towns, they are significantly inferior in terms of conditions in the huge cities.
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task response
Include more specific examples to support your points. Your examples should clearly illustrate your arguments and differentiate the advantages of small towns versus big cities.
task response
Ensure your main points are clearly developed with sufficient explanation. Some points, like the difference in stress levels, could benefit from more detailed discussion.
coherence cohesion
Improve logical transitions between paragraphs and ideas to enhance the overall flow. The essay sometimes jumps from one idea to another without smooth transitions.
coherence cohesion
Work on sentence structure and grammar; minor errors can distract from your overall message. For instance, 'Every day, many people work, study, or travel in big cities travel from other cities so they excite crowded, and polite...' is confusing. A clearer version could be: 'Many people commute to big cities for work, study, or travel, making them crowded but often more polite.'
task response
You provide a clear position and attempt to support it with reasons and examples.
coherence cohesion
There is a logical organization with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
You touch on important aspects such as healthcare, amenities, and stress levels to compare the two settings.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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