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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish.

#people #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country
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There have been different views on whether highly qualified people like doctors and engineers should work in the
country
 where they trained.
While
 keeping
professionals
 in the same
country
 they trained in can be useful, I believe they should be free to work where they want. On the one hand, it can be a waste of money for the government when highly skilled people move to where they want. As
governments
 often invest significant resources in education and training programs, particularly in fields like medicine and engineering, when these
professionals
 immigrate, it can be seen that the
governments
 squander their public funding.
In addition
,
this
 phenomenon can lead to brain drain. when high
professionals
 leave the
country
 where they are educated,
this
country
 faces a shortage of skilled
professionals
, affecting not only in own economic growth but
also
 in
overall
 development.
On the other hand
,
Professionals
 benefit from a higher standard of living in other countries.
In other words
, a significant number of countries offer a high salary and golden job opportunities to highly talented people, so if they cannot be free to move, they will complain about their situation frequently.
For example
,
professionals
 living in North Korea are obliged to live in
this
country
 after finishing their training, highlighting, the increased distinction rate in
this
country
. In conclusion, from my point of view,
although
 maintaining talented
professionals
 can save money for
governments
, it can lead to drastic political issues in the long term, so not until they are free to move, can
governments
 benefit from them.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your main points. For example, you could mention particular countries or statistical data to strengthen your argument about brain drain and economic development.
coherence cohesion
Ensure every paragraph has a clear topic sentence that directly relates to the thesis statement. This will enhance the logical structure of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively summarize your main argument.
task achievement
You have presented both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a balanced perspective.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
What to do next:
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