As we are facing more and more problems,which affect the whole planet,good relationship between different countries are becoming more important than ever before .To what extent do you agree or disagree?

nowadays,developing
benefical
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beneficial
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
between different kinds of
countries
can play crucial roles in many aspects .in my opinion,
i
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I
show examples
strongly believe that increasing a
relationship
among different comunity
provide
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provides
show examples
many opportunities for
people
to increase
food
security and
getting
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get
show examples
familiar with
differen
Correct your spelling
different
types of
culture
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cultures
show examples
,
custome
Correct your spelling
customers
and tradition.
firsty
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first
firstly
, extending a suitable
relation
Replace the word
relationship
show examples
among several populations can be
key
Add an article
a key
show examples
step toward
food
security. because some
countries
suffering from a lack of water in order to increase productivity
.
Correct your spelling
In
in other words
, they are faced with
Correct article usage
a water
show examples
water
Correct article usage
a water
show examples
crisis
.
Correct your spelling
That
that is
why, when
countries
have a good
relationship
with
Correct your spelling
developed
develoled
Correct your spelling
developed
countries
, they can use modern technology to improve the problem of production.
this
way , they can benefit from higher technology,like
Correct article usage
an effecient
show examples
effecient errigation
Correct your spelling
efficient irrigation
network to use a little water to earn
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of production.
secondly
, improving
Add an article
the relation
show examples
relation
Fix the agreement mistake
relations
show examples
between a various
comunity
Correct your spelling
community
can provide many chances for individuals to interact with new
people
to get familiar with
differen
Correct your spelling
different
kinds of cultures,
customes
Correct your spelling
customs
and traditions.
therefore
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people
peple
Correct your spelling
people
can find many job opportunities
Change preposition
in
show examples
among
Change preposition
in
show examples
culture
Add an article
the culture
a culture
show examples
of other
countries
and they earn
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
lof
Correct your spelling
lot of
show examples
money . because
this
things
Change the determiner
thing
show examples
is really interesting for
people
in the other location.
for example
, many
people
in my country have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Turkish
restaurant
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restaurants
show examples
in their
countries
and cook
Turky
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Turkish
food
in their
work place
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workplace
show examples
.
Correct your spelling
This
this
strategy can help them to develop other
culuture
Correct your spelling
cultures
in
hometown
Correct pronoun usage
their hometown
show examples
and make a lot of money . in conclusion, developing
effecient
Correct your spelling
efficient
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
between several
population
Change to a plural noun
populations
show examples
can have
Correct article usage
a
show examples
positive effect increasing
food
security and getting familiar with other
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
which will result in
create
Wrong verb form
creating
show examples
new
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
and
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
a lot of money.
Submitted by salehmiri1995 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure clearer separation between points and ideas to enhance logical structure. Paragraphing should reflect distinct arguments or sub-points.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy, such as subject-verb agreement and sentence fragments, to improve the flow of the essay.
task achievement
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task achievement
Ensure each idea is fully developed before moving on to the next for more comprehensive discussion, which will improve the clarity of your ideas.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt effectively, showing a good understanding of the topic and a clear stance.
task achievement
Provides some relevant examples to support the points made, which shows an attempt to make the essay more engaging and informative.
coherence cohesion
Both an introduction and conclusion are present, framing the essay well and enhancing coherence.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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